Body Language Quotes Quotes

Who are we the most comfortable with? People who are the most like us! The “Similarity-Attraction Hypothesis” (Newcomb, 1956) found that similar (real or perceived) personalities are a major determinant of our likability and friendship choices. It is simply human to gravitate toward people like us. This tribal inclination runs the gamut across demographics of age, ethnicity, culture, education, religion, and even personality style. Mirroring will enable you to find ways to create the comfort of familiarity through similarity.

~ Susan C. Young

Since we know people like to do business with people who are most like themselves, consider this: Excellent sales people understand that matching and mirroring another person’s body language is a powerful technique and subliminal way to develop trust, build rapport, and make their clients more comfortable and engaging. Subtly mirroring the postures, gestures, and body language of your client inspires a kinship of commonality.

~ Susan C. Young

Early in my sales career, various sales trainers taught our teams how to use matching and mirroring to build rapport and earn trust with our clients. When done well, it would inevitably help us improve customer service and closing ratios. It was not encouraged as a deceptive sales practice to manipulate, but rather a subtle way to make a great first impression and connect on a meaningful level.

~ Susan C. Young

By mirroring, speaking, and moving in tandem with my clients, I provided them with a sense of familiar comfort and ease which helped us work well together. When they leaned forward, I would lean forward. When they crossed their arms, I would cross my arms. When they began speaking slowly and quietly, I would do the same. These subtle actions help to us to communicate more effectively.

~ Susan C. Young

Becoming aware of what you are doing and how others perceive you will provide you with instant insight for making changes where necessary.

~ Susan C. Young

Whatever you are putting out into the universe is going to be returned unto you and have a direct correlation to what you are getting back. In many ways, you are a magnet and manifest accordingly.

~ Susan C. Young

Think of your personal and professional life—are you attracting what you want? Are you attracting the kind of people you like? Do you feel that life is working for you or against you? How have others been treating you? Are you pleased with your results?

~ Susan C. Young

You can shift other people's attitudes by shifting your own. When people project rudeness, impatience, and intolerance they attract the same in return. If someone looks like they are having a difficult day, you can shift their world by simply sharing a kind word.

~ Susan C. Young

Modeling for others a sincerely positive and encouraging countenance will not only enrich their lives, it can foster trust and appreciation for you. This subtle technique of mirroring can help others feel compatibility with you and lead them to feel better about themselves. A win for everybody!

~ Susan C. Young

5 Tips for Mirroring Others1. Body language. When they smile, you smile. When they lean back in their chair, you lean back in your chair. When they cross their legs or fold their arms, you do the same.2. Vocabulary or specific words. Notice their language and the words they choose and use—their keywords, expressions, expletives, or phrases. 3. Communication style. People receive, process, and deliver information in different ways. Notice whether someone is results driven or relaxed, emotional or pragmatic, talkative or observant. Recognizing their style will enable you to adapt your style to theirs to build rapport and improve communication.4. Vocal style. a. Speech rate—If they are talking fast, you talk fast. If they are talking slowly, you talk slowly. Consider rhythm, pace, and tempo. b. Volume—If they are speaking quietly and softly, match their volume. c. Tone—Mirror their emotion, tone, and pitch. You can even seek to mirror their grammar and dialect, as long as it is discreet and respectful.

~ Susan C. Young

Mirroring and matching works at the sub-conscious level and serves to make the other person feel more “comfortable” and connected to you. These subliminal actions can create a subconscious feeling of unison and connection that demonstrate how much you have in common.

~ Susan C. Young

Your eyes are the windows to your soul” indeed. It is a cliché for a good reason—it is a timeless truth with universal application.

~ Susan C. Young

Your direct eye contact is one of the best compliments you can give another human being. You are subliminally telling them that you are listening, they matter, and that what they have to say is important.

~ Susan C. Young

Meaningful eye contact has the power to transcend time and space to connect us with others and can be one of the most gracious and important ways to demonstrate attention and respect.

~ Susan C. Young

When you make eye contact with another person, you can send thousands of silent messages without even speaking a word. No wonder eye contact can be both a direct form of communication and an elusive attribute at the same time.

~ Susan C. Young

One simple glance can convey to your recipient that you are . . .• Present• Interested• Paying attention• Being respectful• Listening• Confident• Engaged• Caring• Dedicated• Appreciative• Empathetic• Focused• Supportive• Trustworthy• Acknowledging• ExcitedThis list barely scratches the surface; however, it opens the conversation about how vital your eye contact is for making positive first impressions.

~ Susan C. Young

Whether it is in a sales situation, love at first sight, a husband and wife having an important conversation, a parent disciplining a child, or a teacher instructing her students, eye contact is a powerful body language for enriching engagement, focus, and communication.

~ Susan C. Young

What makes one person approachable and another one not? That simple difference alone can make or break your success in your life, in your relationships, and in your career.

~ Susan C. Young

Approachability is a crucial way of being that empowers you with an extraordinary edge to make a great first impression, invite interaction, build rapport, and win friends.

~ Susan C. Young

Don't you love meeting an approachable person? They roll out the proverbial “welcome mat.” Their energy and engaging openness make us feel safe. They project the messages, “I'm so glad to meet you. I like you. Tell me more about you. I'm so glad that you're here,” without even saying a word.

~ Susan C. Young

We’ll Leave the Light on for You! This Motel 6 slogan has been a successful marketing strategy for years because of its warm invitation and friendly welcome. They know that the comforts of home appeal to us all.

~ Susan C. Young

Expect good things from people; they feel it. You never know who you are going to meet, and projecting approachability will open doors of opportunity for you that you may not have discovered otherwise.

~ Susan C. Young

We are comforted when a person, place, or business is warm and inviting. Making us feel this way increases the likelihood that we will want to learn more, do business with them, or pursue a meaningful interaction.

~ Susan C. Young

Consider how others may feel about you before, during, and after talking. Are you projecting an attitude that results in others feeling accepted and welcome? Are you encouraging people to speak and engage with you through your approachability?

~ Susan C. Young

The consistency of their moods and emotions creates a predictable and consistent outcome that can be reassuring in our turbulent times. You know you can depend on approachable people to be well balanced, accepting, and empathetic to the needs and feelings of others.

~ Susan C. Young

Approachable people are “straight-up.” It is comforting to know exactly what to expect when you see them. What you see is what you get!

~ Susan C. Young

Being a keen observer, I would think to myself, who is approachable? Who is someone I'd like to know? Who is putting out welcoming vibes?

~ Susan C. Young

Having moved from Florida to Wisconsin, it has been an interesting exercise for me to attend networking events where I did not know a soul. I would silently scan the room to see who was approachable and who was not. It was those individuals who put out the approachable vibes whom I would be magnetized toward to engage in conversation.

~ Susan C. Young

Are you being approachable when you are around new people? Ever not know what to say? Simply smile when you make eye contact. This is a subliminal invitation to help others feel safe—allowing a conversation to follow naturally.

~ Susan C. Young

As humans, we are all insecure to a certain degree, and we don't want to risk looking stupid, being rejected, or feeling awkward.

~ Susan C. Young

An approachable person intuitively knows how to set new acquaintances at ease and create a safety net for them to be vulnerable and authentic.

~ Susan C. Young

Welcome is a word to use often! Leaders who maintain an open-door policy inspire trust, teamwork, and healthier communication. They are more likely to earn respect, gain buy-in, and foster collaboration.

~ Susan C. Young

When individuals feel comfortable approaching their leaders, their confidence to share ideas, discuss problems, and offer suggestions is strengthened. It emboldens them to take personal ownership and perform at higher levels within the organization.

~ Susan C. Young

Unfortunately, unapproachable leaders create a tense environment that may prevent their people from bringing their best strengths and talents or challenges and solutions forward.

~ Susan C. Young