Many folks describe arrogant people as jerks, idiots, creeps, and much worse. A person that treats you like you are stupid and says the only right way is their way – even when it clearly is not – is arrogant. They try to make up for their own lack of confidence by hammering away at others.
When you forgive, it does not mean that you have submitted, it simply means that you have made a choice to stop bearing any grudge.
You are the custodian of your own happiness. What other people say, do or think does not create a basis for your happiness. It is you who decides your own happiness, just like forgiveness.
Locking ourselves in the situation where we wish for sympathy and want to be looked at as the aggrieved party normally makes us powerless.
The idea of forgiveness is a journey that requires patience. If the journey of forgiveness is well travelled, there is a chance that we are bound to change in a very helpful way.
Sometimes we are very convinced that what we went through needs to be re-lived so we end up going back and forth to the demons of the past and eventually we fail to get over them.
The minute we put aside our self-righteousness and move away from being the aggrieved, then we are on a healing process.
The only thing that will make us remain glued to being the victim is our failure to handle the emotions that we go through and the pain that overcomes us.
When you forgive, you are freed from some of the feelings of disapproval and it can contribute to lessening your negative thoughts.
Offer yourself forgiveness as a gift. The word ‘give’ is the basic keyword in the word forgiveness, therefore it relays a meaning therein.
The same zeal and guts with which you were persistent not to forgive is the same zeal and enthusiasm with which you should be able to open up a new relationship with your partner, loved one or friend, one that is founded on commitment and dedication.
Your forgiveness or failure to forgive simply takes you nearer or further away from your ultimate goal. There are no two ways to deal with it, there is only one.
Blaming other people inevitably makes us blame ourselves because if we are pointing the finger at someone, practically, we are pointing it at ourselves as well.
We are often so convinced that we are so hurt and in pain, so much so that we opt not to forgive. Yet, as a consequence, that is what will make you weak!
Just because you have been through a bad experience does not give you the ticket to keep going back to that situation over and over again and dramatizing it out of proportion.
Overly playing the role of the victim can debar you from accepting responsibility for your actions and emotions.
The idea of always wanting to be the victim in circumstances where you have been offended is a common human trait. Each person wants to be viewed as the aggrieved party.
Do the forgiveness and carry on going forward. Leave the worrying to the other person. Eat what is on your plate and leave the rest to them.
The purpose of forgiveness is not to make sure that someone ends up changing into what you expect them to be, as this is dominance. The purpose is actually to make your own life better, more worthy and less stressful. Forgiveness reduces the hold that the wrongdoer has over you and empowers you.
Assuming you are still lost in thought about when exactly you should forgive someone, well the time is NOW.
Distancing yourself from some painful event is probably the ignition for the process of forgiveness.
Other people may well not find it relevant that you have forgiven yourself, but you need to know that it is not for them anyway. Everything at the moment is wholly about you.
A broken and mended relationship turns out to be stronger than one that has never been broken, almost like how bones can become even stronger once broken and then healed.
Take a walk through the garden of forgiveness and pick a flower of forgiveness for everything you have ever done.
You are simply naturally inclined to make mistakes just as everyone else is, whether male or female, black or white, young or old. These mistakes are your school of learning, therefore forgiveness is your greatest teacher in this school of learning.
If there ever was someone who had a control over you, someone who could cause you the greatest pain, someone who could ignore your most necessary requirements and someone for whom forgiveness were truly difficult to render, that person is none other than YOU.
Just because someone wakes up one morning and says, “Today I am going to be rich,” does not automatically make them rich. So the same is true with forgiveness, it has to come from the heart with meaning, that is when it works best.