Mollie Gross said this quote

“ The girdle went from just under my breasts to the top of my knees. It cinched me in pretty tight. In fact, it was so tight that when I sat in it and farted, the farts would slide up my back, shoot out the top of the girdle, and make my hair fly off the back of my beck. ”

Famous Quotes of Mollie Gross

Famous quotes of Mollie Gross from the classy quote

See all

Before we left home, my hair had already started to fall apart. I decided to pull it into a bun high on my head and attach one of those fake hair things that look like a nest of cute curls. I slapped a tiara on my head and was good to go. I had my weave, my girdle, and my tiara. I was ready to party!

~ Mollie Gross

I found myself surrounded by really old veterans wearing hats that said, Retired Marine - SEMPER FI. These hats didn't appear to fit on their heads, but instead seemed to hover over them.At one point, I mistakenly tried to take the last box of crackers that a veteran also wanted. He started yelling, I ran away from home at seventeen, lied about my age, and joined the Corps! I fought in World War II, Korea, and NAM! I have no cartilage in my right knee! It's bone-on-bone, but every morning I run six miles! I did not sacrifice my knee for this country to come here today and have you disrespect me at the commissary. Oooh-RAH!I dropped the crackers and walked away.

~ Mollie Gross

It seemed harmless enough until she misplaced her Dildo and started calling the neighbors to ask if she could borrow one of theirs!

~ Mollie Gross

Grandma, everyone out here is bleaching their anuses. What do I do?Her advice? Baby, go outside in the sun and squirt a little lemon juice on it.

~ Mollie Gross