When shame is met with compassion and not received as confirmation of our guilt, we can begin to see how slant a lens it has had us looking through. That awareness lets us step back far enough to see that if we can let it go, we will see ourselves as clean where we once thought we were dirty. We will remember our innocence. We will see how our shame supported a system in which the perpetrators were protected and we bore the brunt of their offense — first in its actuality, then again in carrying their shame for it.If the method we chose to try to beat out shame was perfectionism, we can relax now, shake the burden off our shoulders, and give ourselves a chance to loosen up and make some errors. Hallelujah! Our freedom will not come from tireless effort and getting it all exactly right.

~ Maureen Brady

Maureen Brady Abuse Survivors Abuser Abusers Burdens Of The Past Child Rape Child Sexual Abuse False Guilt Freedom Guilt Healing Healing From Abuse Healing Insights Imperfect Incest Innocence Innocence Lost Offense Peptrator Perfectionism Perfectly Imperfect Perpetrators Recovery Recovery From Abuse Sexual Abuse Shame Survivors

When we first begin to take power more directly, after long having kept our relationship to it underground...it is natural that we experience anxiety, even guilt, at putting ourselves first. These feeling let us know we are taking action; they do not need to stop us.

~ Maureen Brady

Maureen Brady Abuse Survivors Anxiety Assertiveness Child Sexual Abuse Survivor Empowering False Guilt Guilt Healing Healing Insights Power Survivors