A poet, any real poet, is simply an alchemist who transmutes his cynicism regarding human beings into an optimism regarding the moon, the stars, the heavens, and the flowers, to say nothing of the spring, love, and dogs.
~ George Jean Nathan
Opening night is the night before the play is ready to open.
I drink to make other people interesting.
There is something distinguished about even his failures they sink not trivially but with a certain air of majesty like a great ship its flags flying full of holes.
Love demands infinitely less than friendship.
Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor.
A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy.
Patriotism is often an arbitrary veneration of real estate above principles.
Beauty makes idiots sad and wise men merry.
An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.
I know many married men, I even know a few happily married men, but I don't know one who wouldn't fall down the first open coal hole running after the first pretty girl who gave him a wink.
No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched.
