J.k. Rowling Quotes

I am a wizard, not a baboon brandishing a stick.

~ J.k. Rowling

Am I about to discover where you, Ron, and Hermione disappeared to while you were supposed to be in the back room of Fred and George's shop?''How did you...?''Harry, please. You're talking to the man who raised Fred and George.

~ J.k. Rowling

When we come face-to-face with one down a dark alley, we're going to be having a shufti to see if it's solid, aren't we, we're not going to be asking, 'Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?

~ J.k. Rowling

And it's Gryfindor in possession again, as Johnson takes the Quaffle— Flint alongside her —poke him in the eye, Angelina —it was a joke, professor, it was a joke...

~ J.k. Rowling

Did you see me disarm Hermione, Harry?Only once said Hermione stung. I got you loads more then you got me—I did not only get you once, I got you at least three times—Well if you're counting the one where you tripped over your own feet and knocked the wand out of my hand—

~ J.k. Rowling

You can laugh! But people used to believe there were no such things as the Blibbering Humdinger or the Crumple-Horned Snorkack!

~ J.k. Rowling

Well you seemed too busy to call him a prat and I thought someone should.

~ J.k. Rowling

Harry and Hermione are very platonic friends. But I won't answer for anyone else, nudge-nudge wink-wink!

~ J.k. Rowling

I thought it sounded a bit like Percy singing... maybe you've got to attack him while he's in the shower, Harry.

~ J.k. Rowling

I have gone temporarily deaf and haven't any idea what you said, Harry.

~ J.k. Rowling

Ask us no questions and we’ll tell you no lies.

~ J.k. Rowling

Beds empty! No note! Car gone — could have crashed — out of my mind with worry — did you care? — never, as long as I’ve lived — you wait until your father gets home, we never had trouble like this from Bill or Charlie or Percy —Perfect Percy,” muttered Fred. —”It seemed to go on for hours. Mrs. Weasley had shouted herself hoarse before she turned on Harry, who backed away.“I’m very pleased to see you, Harry, dear,” she said.

~ J.k. Rowling

Would you like a cough drop Dolores?

~ J.k. Rowling

I see a light in the kitchen. Let us not deprive Molly any longer of the chance to deplore how thin you are.

~ J.k. Rowling

Do I look stupid? snarled Uncle Vernon, a bit of fried egg dangling from his bushy mustache.

~ J.k. Rowling

I was supposed to be waiting up here when you got back, only your Phoenix lot got in the way...”“Yes, they do that,” said Dumbledore.

~ J.k. Rowling

If you think I'm going to let six people risk their lives - !''because it's the first time for all of us,' said Ron.'This is different, pretending to be me -''Well, none of us really fancy it, Harry,' said Fred earnestly. 'Imagine if something went wrong and we were stuck as specky, scrawny gits forever.'Harry did not smile. 'You can't do it if I don't cooperate, you need me to give you some hair.''Well, that's the plan scuppered,' said George. 'Obviously there's no chance at all of us getting a bit of your hair unless you cooperate.''Yeah, thirteen of us against one bloke who's not allowed to use magic; we've got no chance,' said Fred.

~ J.k. Rowling

Professor Kettleburn, our Care of Magical Creatures teacher, retired at the end of last year in order to enjoy more time with his remaining limbs.

~ J.k. Rowling

I WILL NOT TOLERATE MENTION OF YOUR ABNORMALITY UNDER THIS ROOF!

~ J.k. Rowling

Wild! Ron said, twiddling the replay knob on the side. I can make that old bloke down there pick his nose again... and again... and again...

~ J.k. Rowling

How in the name of Merlin's pants have you managed to get your hands on those Horcrux books?

~ J.k. Rowling

So Dobby stopped us from getting on the train and broke your arm. . . . He shook his head. You know what, Harry? If he doesn't stop trying to save your life he's going to kill you.

~ J.k. Rowling

I know how to use a fellytone now.

~ J.k. Rowling

My Head of House said I lacked certain necessary qualities...like the ability to behave myself.

~ J.k. Rowling

The poor things keep calling in those – those pumbles, I think they're called – you know, the ones who mend pipes and things – Plumbers? – exactly, yes, but of course they're flummoxed.

~ J.k. Rowling

Merlin’s beard.

~ J.k. Rowling

I can't give a Professor love!

~ J.k. Rowling

Don't be stupid, it's a flying house!

~ J.k. Rowling

Even if I could, I wouldn't. Scars can come in handy. I have one myself above my left knee that is a perfect map of the London Underground.

~ J.k. Rowling

You see, I, unlike you, have been made a prefect, which means that I, unlike you, have the power to hand out punishments.”“Yeah,” said Harry, “but you, unlike me, are a git.

~ J.k. Rowling

I'm dying! Malfoy yelled, as the class panicked. I'm dying, look at me! It's killed me!

~ J.k. Rowling

That is the second time you have spoken out of turn, Miss Granger,” said Snape coolly. “Five more points from Gryffindor for being an insufferable know-it-all.

~ J.k. Rowling

One can never have enough socks

~ J.k. Rowling

Harry, we saw Uranus up close!” said Ron, still giggling feebly. “Get it, Harry? We saw Uranus — ha ha ha —

~ J.k. Rowling

Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.

~ J.k. Rowling

The truth. Dumbledore sighed. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.

~ J.k. Rowling

As much money and life as you could want! The two things most human beings would choose above all - the trouble is, humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them.

~ J.k. Rowling

And don’t forget: Elvendork! It’s unisex!

~ J.k. Rowling

Newt Scamander : My philosophy is that worrying means you suffer twice.

~ J.k. Rowling

Hermione was screaming again: the sound went through Harry like physical pain.

~ J.k. Rowling