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Sarcasm Quotes

Sarcasm quote from classy quote

This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic.

~ Lorrie Moore

Lorrie Moore Love Relationships Sarcasm

How 'bout a shot of truth in that denial cocktail.

~ Jennifer Salaiz

Jennifer Salaiz Denial Hate Lies Love Sarcasm Truth

Simon: So were you following me? Or is it just an amazing coincidence that you happened to be on the roof of a building I was walking by when I got attacked?Jace: I was following you.Simon: Is this the part where you tell me you're secretly in love with me?

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Humor Jace Lightwood Love Sarcasm Simon Lewis

Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.

~ P.g. Wodehouse

P.g. Wodehouse Blandness Humor Lack Of Feeling Love Lovelessness Marriage Married Life Matrimony Sarcasm

It means 'Shadowhunters: Looking Better in Black Than the Widows of our Enemies Since 1234'.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Humor Jace Wayland Sarcasm

A diary with no drawings of me in it? Where are the torrid fantasies? The romance covers?

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Clary Fray Diary Humor Jace Wayland Sarcasm

Alec looked at her and shook his head. How do you manage never to get mud on your clothes?Isabelle shrugged philosophically. I'm pure at heart. It repels the dirt.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Alec Lightwood City Of Ashes Clean Dirt Humor Isabelle Lightwood Sarcasm

Sebastian just smiled. “I could hear your heart beating,” he said softly. “When you were watching me with Valentine. Did it bother you?”“That you seem to be dating my dad?” Jace shrugged. You’re a little young for him, to be honest.”“What?” For the first time since Jace had met him, Sebastian seemed flabbergasted.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Humor Jace Wayland Realization Sarcasm Sebastian Valentine Morgenstern

Are you always a smartass?'Nope. Sometimes I'm asleep.

~ Jim Butcher

Jim Butcher Humor Impudence Sarcasm Smartass

It’s fascinating. You know all these words, and they’re all English, but when you string them together into sentences, they just don’t make any sense.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare City Of Fallen Angels Humor Jace Lightwood Sarcasm

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm.It's really funny.

~ Brandon Sanderson

Brandon Sanderson Humor Sarcasm

I don't do what I'm told, but I might do what you want if you ask me nicely.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Humor Imogen Herondale Impudence Jace Wayland Obedience Rebelliousness Sarcasm

I turned to Dionysus. You cured him?Madness is my specialty. It was quite simple.But...you did something nice. Why?He raised and eyebrow. I am nice! I simple ooze niceness, Perry Johansson. Haven't you noticed?

~ Rick Riordan

Rick Riordan Dionysus Humor Madness Nice Percy Jackson Sarcasm

I'm sorry. I use my rapier wit to hide my inner pain.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Defense Mechanism Humor Sarcasm

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs.

~ Oliver Goldsmith

Oliver Goldsmith Ask Humor Lies Questions Sarcasm Wit Witty

It’s sarcasm, Josh.”“Sarcasm?”“It’s from the Greek, sarkasmos. To bite the lips. It means that you aren’t really saying what you mean, but people will get your point. I invented it, Bartholomew named it.”“Well, if the village idiot named it, I’m sure it’s a good thing.”“There you go, you got it.”“Got what?”“Sarcasm.”“No, I meant it.”“Sure you did.”“Is that sarcasm?”“Irony, I think.”“What’s the difference?”“I haven’t the slightest idea.”“So you’re being ironic now, right?”“No, I really don’t know.”“Maybe you should ask the idiot.”“Now you’ve got it.”“What?”“Sarcasm.

~ Christopher Moore

Christopher Moore Humor Irony Sarcasm

Are you insinuatin' that my daughter is a liar?Oh, no, not at all. I'm saying your daughter is a liar. Surely you can appreciate the difference.

~ Kami Garcia

Kami Garcia Humor Macon Sarcasm

I cannot speak well enough to be unintelligible.

~ Jane Austen

Jane Austen Convoluted Speech Expression Humor Intelligibility Sarcasm

I don't know how you persist in being so stubborn-It's a superpower. I was bitten by a radioactive mule.

~ Shannon Hale

Shannon Hale Humor Retort Sarcasm Stubborn Superpower

If you say ‘we’re in this together,’ I’m going to hurl.

~ Kelley Armstrong

Kelley Armstrong Humor Sarcasm

Yes. Reyn is our resident horse master. He has an excellent seat.I grinned. I've noticed.Reyn's face tightened and Nell flushed, looking embarrassed. It's an equestrian term.Really? I thought you were talking about his ass.

~ Cate Tiernan

Cate Tiernan Humor Sarcasm Teasing Witty

I was supposed to be waiting up here when you got back, only your Phoenix lot got in the way...”“Yes, they do that,” said Dumbledore.

~ J.k. Rowling

J.k. Rowling Dumbledore Humor Malfoy Order Of The Phoenix Sarcasm

Can you enter a house uninvited?No.Why?That would be rude.

~ Abigail Gibbs

Abigail Gibbs Fabian Humor Sarcasm Vampire Mythology Violet

Let me ask you a question Alex. What do you think is the greatest evil on this plant today?Is that including, or not including you?

~ Anthony Horowitz

Anthony Horowitz Humor Sarcasm

Katniss: 'What about you? Ive seen you in the market. You can lift hundred pound bags of flour'. I snap at himTell him that. Thats not nothing.Peeta: Yes and Im sure the arena will be full of bags of flour for me to chuck at people.

~ Suzanne Collins

Suzanne Collins Humor Sarcasm

Yes, we'll yell, 'Help, help us, goose girl, and bring the terrifying legion of warrior geese'.

~ Shannon Hale

Shannon Hale Goose Humor Isi Sarcasm

How long have you been with Raphael?”“You ask a lot of questions for a dead woman.”“What can I say? I prefer to die well-informed.”-Venom and Elena

~ Nalini Singh

Nalini Singh Badass Humor Nalini Singh Paranormal Sarcasm

You did not just say that. I have a feeling we're on the verge of hugging and coming up with cute nicknames for each other.

~ Richelle Mead

Richelle Mead Humor Sarcasm

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic.

~ Sarah Rees Brennan

Sarah Rees Brennan Humor Sarcasm

You must have been going very fast.I was, until I hit the fence.

~ Anthony Horowitz

Anthony Horowitz Humor Sarcasm

I'm telling you, you really should stick to mating within your species, whatever that is.''I would,' I said, 'but unfortunately, there are no gorgeous, all-powerful, all-knowing gods around here. I'd even settle for a demigod. It's a step down, I know. But alas, there are nothing but low-brained mortals here. And half-brains, like you.

~ Kristin Walker

Kristin Walker Gods Humor Sarcasm

She'd met Colin on a Monday.She'd kissed him on a Friday.Twelve years later.She sighed. It seemed fairly pathetic.

~ Julia Quinn

Julia Quinn Funny Humor Sarcasm

What is your advice to young writers?” “Drink, fuck and smoke plenty of cigarettes.

~ Charles Bukowski

Charles Bukowski Advice Alcohol Authors Bukowski Cigarettes Drink Funny Humor Ironic Irony Sarcasm Sex Smoke Writers Writing Writing Process

Young people, nowadays, imagine that money is everything.Yes, murmured Lord Henry, settling his button-hole in his coat; and when they grow older they know it.

~ Oscar Wilde

Oscar Wilde Humor Imagine Know Money Old Sarcasm Young

I don't know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.

~ Jim Butcher

Jim Butcher Ego Ferro Harry Dresden Humor Sarcasm

Then why are you here?” Emma demanded. “Oh, is this one of those missed-connections things? We met the other night, you felt a spark? Sorry, but I don’t date trees.”“I am not a tree.” Iarlath looked angry, his bark peeling slightly.

~ Cassandra Clare

Cassandra Clare Humor Sarcasm Sassiness

Thomas: Is it [my brain] fixed?Brenda: It worked, judging from the fact that you're not trying to kill us anymore...

~ James Dashner

James Dashner Brain Humor Maze Runner Mind Control Sarcasm Sci Fi

You could shove it up your ass and pretend you're a corn dog.COURTESY VIOLATION-RESPONSE MUTED-VIOLATION LOGGED

~ Ernest Cline

Ernest Cline Humor Sarcasm

How are you feeling?I leaned away from him. Gross.Aiden frowned. Gross?I haven't brushed my teeth or washed my face in days. Don't come near me.He laughed. Alex, come on.Seriously, I'm gross. I put my hand over my mouth.Ignoring my protests, he leaned over and brushed my string hair back. You're as beautiful as always, Alex.I stared at him. He must not get out much.

~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

Jennifer L. Armentrout Aiden Alex Funny Humor Sarcasm

Should I pull on a shirt? he asked with hint of amusement. I WILL NOT BLUSH. No. He'd be doing the world a favor if he never wore a shirt again, but I wasn't going to tell him that part. You're fine.

~ Gena Showalter

Gena Showalter Humor Sarcasm
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