Sophie Oak Quotes

MEG (to Dante, the vampire):“Vampires aren’t as cool as I expected them to be. In romance novels, vampires are all dark and broody and sexy. In real life, you talk an awful lot about stocks.

~ Sophie Oak

What I don’t get is how this helps me. You two get superpowers, and I get what?”Cian smiled broadly. “You have a power, Meggie. You have a magical pussy. It was sleeping with you together that brought us into our power. That vagina of yours is pure gold, lover.” Meg gave Cian a playful shove and rolled her eyes while he and his brother had a good laugh.“Don’t go expecting to use it on anyone else,” Beck said as though the thought had suddenly occurred to him. “That only works on the two of us.”Meg walked up to him and gave him a saucy smile. “Yes, Beck, I was planning on opening up shop. I was going to hang a sign on the cottage door and charge for it.

~ Sophie Oak

...I don't know what marriages are like on your plane. I know Fae marriages can be all about respect and treating your wife like a lady. That's crap, love. You're my wife. I'm going to do all sorts of filthy things to you because you belong to me. You're my little toy. I'm going to fuck you as often as I can and in as many ways as my filthy mind can come up with. That's a strong marriage.

~ Sophie Oak

It’s a long shot, but this baby is pretty cool.” He pushed the button that brought up the menu. “I need to run a search.”“Of course, master,” the computer said with an inviting smile. “Which pornographic material should I seek out today?”Dante grinned. “Really? You can do that?” He felt Meg’s stare. “Nothing like that.

~ Sophie Oak

That’s a Planeswalker demon.” Dante slumped into the seat behind her. “You aren’t crazy.” Meg slid him a bemused glance. “I thought we’d settled that a few weeks back.”“Nope,” he said,shaking his head. “I was still certain you were loony.”“Then why have you been helping me?”“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, sweetheart, but you have fabulous tits,” Dante said with a sigh. “I figured once you gave up on the whole idea of being queen of the faery world, you might consider sleeping with me. Now I see that demons are real. I’m going to church tomorrow.

~ Sophie Oak

What makes you think it was your sperm? My sperm is obviously the dominant sperm. My sperm told your sperm to get to the back of line. The boy will have black hair and green eyes.”Sam shook his head. “I bet my sperm listens to your sperm just about as good as I listen to you. My sperm is also very impatient. It ran to that egg. Little Sam is gonna be a handful.

~ Sophie Oak

You’ve seen the movies. Bad guy always comes back.

~ Sophie Oak

What’s up with all these guys not realizing they’re bisexual? Here’s the clue, buddy, when you’re around another dude and you get a hard-on, you might be bi.

~ Sophie Oak

That life is far too short to waste on grudges. Love does not come along often. When it does, you can’t throw it away because it isn’t perfect.

~ Sophie Oak

Those big green eyes were even bigger than usual as she stared at the two of them. For a moment, she looked like a kid who’d found the last cupcake on the planet.

~ Sophie Oak

This was taken when my brother was last on leave. My mom’s new boyfriend took it. Now there’s an insane person. Well, he’s from the next town over. Everyone in that freaking town is butt-fuck crazy. I’m totally moving there one day.

~ Sophie Oak

Excuse me. What did you say to me? For your information Danielle, the stick up my ass has served me well over the years. I will not be removing it, but I might have something to shove up yours when you return from class.

~ Sophie Oak

Thanks, babe. It takes true talent to get your ass whipped.

~ Sophie Oak

Did not. My stubbornness doesn’t even own a gun. My stubbornness is a pacifist.

~ Sophie Oak

Hey, it’s totally masculine. It’s cowboy butt sex.

~ Sophie Oak

I’m a nice person. I give money to starving babies and properly tip my hairdresser. Why am I the one everyone tries to kill?

~ Sophie Oak

Look, when I’m here, I don’t have to think. I don’t have to worry. I don’t even have to be me if I don’t want to. That came out wrong. I don’t have to be the me I have to be all day.

~ Sophie Oak

Daddy, Momma! I made a friend. His name is Ike, and he ain’t got no tail because they chopped it off, but Aidan didn’t cop it off. Tourists chopped it off. But then Aiden went and fought the tourist. I hope we don’t get no tourists here. We would have to hide all the dogs.

~ Sophie Oak

Not that you’ll have any fun. I know my safe word, and I intend to use it.

~ Sophie Oak

The wedding ring she’s wearing is collar enough,” Jack bit out. “I know. I put it on her finger. You can see that fucking diamond from space.

~ Sophie Oak

I don’t think about that day the crazy lady tried to shoot Abby but got you instead. It was an awful day. When it does cross my mind, I turn it around and think about something nice, like Abby’s pussy. I just take a deep breath and picture it in my mind. It’s my happy place.

~ Sophie Oak

I’ve been fully instructed. I’m to hold you if you cry and rub some salve into your butt so it doesn’t sting anymore. I am not to play with your boobs.”Jack sent his brother a stern look.“Or anything else,” Lucas concluded with a gulp. “I can pat your back and try really hard not to get an erection.

~ Sophie Oak

It’s just a little guy-liner

~ Sophie Oak