Active Listening Quotes

But why bother? Why exert all this effort to focus totally on the boring prattlings of a six-year-old?First, your willingness to do so is the best possible concrete evidence of your esteem you can give your child. If you give your child the same esteem you would give a great lecturer, then the child will know him- or herself to be valued and therefore will feel valuable. There is no better and ultimately no other way to teach your children that they are valuable people than by valuing them.Second, the more children feel valuable, the more they will begin to say things of value. They will rise to your expectation of them.Third, the more you listen to your child, the more you will realize that in amongst the pauses, the stutterings, the seemingly innocent chatter, your child does indeed have valuable things to say. The dictum that great wisdom comes from the mouths of babes is recognized as an absolute fact by anyone who truly listens to children. Listen to your child enough and you will come to realize that he or she is quite an extraordinary individual. And the more extraordinary you realize your child to be, the more you will be willing to listen. And the more you will learn.Fourth, the more you know about your child, the more you will be able to teach. Know little about your children, and usually you will be teaching things that either they are not ready to learn or they already know and perhaps understand better than you.Finally, the more children know that you value them, that you consider them extraordinary people, the more willing they will be to listen to you and afford you the same esteem. And the more appropriate your teaching, based on your knowledge of them, the more eager your children will be to learn from you. And the more they learn, the more extraordinary they will become. If the reader senses the cyclical character of this process, he or she is quite correct and is appreciating the truth of the reciprocity of love. Instead of a vicious downward cycle, it is a creative upward cycle of evolution and growth. Value creates value. Love begets love. Parents and child together spin forward faster and faster in the pas de deux of love.

~ M. Scott Peck

As a father, we need to actively listen.

~ Asa Don Brown

Millennials (aka Generation Y) are great at social media (Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn, Twitter,Tumblr, Instagram, Flickr, Snapchat, Pinterest, YouTube, Vimeo, and Periscope) but lack time tested social skills ( patience, humility, active listening, respect for parents, teachers, elderly)

~ Ramesh Lohia

UN-Impressives of the Poor Listener• Thinking about what you should have done, could have done, or need to do. • Allowing your emotional reactions to take over.• Interrupting the person talking.• Replying before you hear all the facts.• Jumping to conclusions and making assumptions.• Being preoccupied with what you're going to say next. • Getting defensive or being over-eager. • One-upmanship—feeling the urge to compete and add something bigger, better, or more significant than what the speaker has to share.• Imposing an unsolicited opinion.• Ignoring and changing the subject altogether.

~ Susan C. Young

Being PresentYears ago, I attended a conference where the keynote speaker encouraged everyone to BE HERE NOW! It grabbed people's attention and reminded us that living, loving, listening, and laughing all occur in the present moment.

~ Susan C. Young

Active listening requires being fully present and engaged in the moment.

~ Susan C. Young

When you are mindfully focused, the person with whom you are communicating feels that you are making them a priority—that you value their time and their perspective. It is in these moments that we can go to deeper levels of discovery, exploration, and connection. It is one of the most valuable gifts and finest compliments you can give to another.

~ Susan C. Young

To Become an Attentive Listener . . . • Observe a person’s physical presence to see how their body language aligns with their message. • Recognize what is being said on the surface.• Engage your intuition to hear the meaning, purpose, and motivation behind their message. • Be aware of your own internal responses and how you are feeling.• Put yourself in their shoes to better understand their perspective.

~ Susan C. Young

Become keenly aware of these three layers to discover whether you're listening with interest and intent for excellent communication and understanding—or are you unintentionally sabotaging potentially phenomenal conversations. Knowledge of the listening planes will raise your awareness. And as you apply these, enjoy the surprising difference.

~ Susan C. Young

Becoming an empathetic listener helps you to better understand how another person feels and why they communicate as they do.

~ Susan C. Young

Your heightened awareness of their perceptions, experiences, emotions, and personality styles can reveal why they feel the way they do so that you can choose your responses wisely and compassionately.

~ Susan C. Young

My friend John is an urgent care physician who has several patients who come to see him for various ailments on a regular basis. In addition to being brilliant and taking wonderful care of his patients, he has a unique ability to empathetically listen to his patient’s needs. One of his patients is a repeat visitor, even when she's not exhibiting symptoms. He takes the time to listen to how she's feeling and responds with kindness, empathy, and caring. He has come to realize that her visits are filling her deep need to feel validated, cared for, and understood in ways which she does not receive at home. His empathetic listening delivers incredible customer service for patient care and makes him a better health care provider. Wouldn’t it be incredible if this was the manner for not only doctors, but all professionals?

~ Susan C. Young

When my son Nick was five years old, he was sitting at the kitchen bar while I prepared dinner. In typical busy mother fashion, I was multitasking—cooking, cleaning, running the laundry, answering the phone, and attempting to listen to what he had to say.

~ Susan C. Young

Listening is one of the finest ways to demonstrate our love for another human being. How many marriages could be saved, friendships healed, careers made, and opportunities enjoyed if people would simply stop what they are doing and listen deeply to what another person has to say. If practiced by everyone, this principle could be a world-changer!

~ Susan C. Young

The process of attentive listening makes the other person feel important, valued, and heard. For Nick, listening was, and still is, love. I've never forgotten that precious moment—and the lesson!

~ Susan C. Young

Think about the people in your life with whom you have the most engaging dialogue—the ones who will listen to you and consider your opinions regardless of the topic. They'll stop whatever they are doing to give you their full attention. They become completely present and hear you.

~ Susan C. Young

The Physical Language of ListeningActive listening is a physical process which transcends simply hearing. Your body language speaks on your behalf as to whether you are fully present and engaged . . . •,Make eye contact.•,Nod your head, confirm.•,Use your eyebrows and expressions of emotions to show that you're paying attention. •,Lean forward.•,Listen patiently to demonstrate respect and sensitivity.•,Open your physical presence to encourage them to continue.

~ Susan C. Young

Now let’s look at the flip side. When a diligent and caring person receives your complaint, they have the power to turn a challenge into a triumph. Through active listening, they demonstrate that your satisfaction is their top priority. They not only seek to solve your problem, but they are dedicated to re-earning your trust, your respect, and keeping your business.

~ Susan C. Young

If you have ever experienced this type of unprofessional treatment, I doubt you would even consider giving them business in the future. Interrupting, ignoring, patronizing, or antagonizing a customer is like pouring gas on a fire and creates a more explosive situation than the original complaint. Still, it continues to happen every day, costing companies millions in lost revenue.

~ Susan C. Young

Have you ever had a legitimate complaint as a customer which made you angry, upset, or frustrated? How was it “handled? If you were dealing with an inept, uncaring, or untrained employee, they may have made matters even worse by being rude, defensive, or apathetic. Simple acknowledgment and validation of your complaint is sometimes all that is needed. Without it, you're left frustrated or upset.

~ Susan C. Young

Active listening is not only a matter of making yourself available to hear someone talk, but it is showing the sender, physically, that you are receiving and understanding their message on all levels.

~ Susan C. Young

Active listening is the ultimate Golden Rule for sensational customer service. Just as the important people in your life will feel more valued and appreciated when you actively listen, so will your customers.

~ Susan C. Young

Active listening is one of the best services a company can provide.

~ Susan C. Young

ASK YOURSELF: How can you utilize active listening to provide sensational customer service? How will this help resolve complaints from unhappy customers?• Give them your full attention and listen without interruption or defensiveness.• Thank them for bringing the issue to your attention.• Take their concerns seriously and share their sense of urgency to resolve the problem quickly.• Ask questions and focus on what they are really saying. • Listen to their words, tone of voice, body language, and most importantly, how they feel. • Beware of making assumptions or rushing to conclusions before you hear their concern fully.• Explain, guide, educate, assist, and do what’s necessary to help them reach the resolution.• Treat them with respect and empathy.When you do an amazing job of resolving an unhappy customer’s problem, you may end up impressing them more than if the problem had never occurred. You may have just earned their loyalty . . . forever!

~ Susan C. Young

This method enabled me to expand my territory and create a strong network of loyal customers for referrals and repeat business. Make active listening a deliberate part of your business plan and success strategy. You will not only grow your business, but also make wonderful friends along the way.

~ Susan C. Young

My success with customers on the telephone wasn’t by using pushy sales methods, but by engaging people in meaningful conversations which could lead to friendships on the phone before I ever met them. I would ask questions, listen to their stories, respond to their needs, develop rapport, and earn their business. When we would finally meet in person, it felt less like an introduction and more like a reunion. It was not only good business, we had fun in the process!

~ Susan C. Young

For sixteen years, I had a spectacular real estate career in Tallahassee, Florida. I loved receiving telephone inquiries and making cold calls. I knew that if I could meet people on the phone, I could usually turn them into buyers.

~ Susan C. Young

14 Ways to Become an Incredible Listener1. Be present and provide your undivided attention.2. Seek first to understand, then to be understood.3. Listen attentively and respond appropriately.4. Minimize or eliminate distractions.5. Focus your attention and energy with singleness of purpose on what the other person is saying.6. Quiet your mind and suspend your thoughts to make room in your head to hear what is said—in the moment!7. Ask questions and demonstrate empathy.8. Use your body language and nonverbal cues constructively and pay attention to theirs.9. Follow the rhythm of their speech; hear their tone.10. Repeat and summarize what you have heard them say to confirm understanding.11. Be open-minded and non-defensive.12. Respond rather than react. 13. Be respectful, calm, and positive.14. Try to resolve conflicts, not win them.

~ Susan C. Young

Listening is one thing; however, ACTIVE listening is quite another. The first is a passive act which does not require great involvement, whereas, the latter is a consciously aware and deliberately focused effort to actively participate in the conversation.

~ Susan C. Young

Think of the communication that takes place in your own life on a continuous basis—at home, at work, with friends, and beyond. When you actively listen to people, you enhance communication.

~ Susan C. Young

Listening actively confirms for people that you are positively receiving and thoroughly understanding the message they are conveying.

~ Susan C. Young

By your practice of active listening, everyone involved benefits because you . . .• are more engaged and engaging;• demonstrate that you are interested in others and what they have to say;• make others feel important, respected, understood, and appreciated; • improve your memory and retention;• affirm to others that you are an authentic, caring, and compassionate person;make a great first and last impression

~ Susan C. Young

If the skill of participatory listening came effortlessly and easy for everyone, there would not be so many misunderstandings, communication breakdowns, irritations, and frustrations.

~ Susan C. Young

Active listening is key to all healthy and effective communication, however, it doesn't necessarily come easily.

~ Susan C. Young

Through the years, I have heard that the average person speaks at about 150-160 words per minute, but can listen at a rate of about 1,000 words per minute. What is going on during all that extra mind time? • Our minds are racing ahead and preparing for the next thing we are going to say.• We are preoccupied with other thoughts, priorities, and distractions.• Our subconscious filters are thumbing through our database of memories, judgments, experiences, perspectives, and opinions to frame how we are going to interpret what we think someone is saying.

~ Susan C. Young

While active listening is crucial for optimal communication, we are faced with a dilemma which can perplex even the sincerest and engaged of individuals.

~ Susan C. Young

You can have the perfect message, but it may fall on deaf ears when the listener is not prepared or open to listening.These listening planes were first introduced by the American composer Aaron Copland (1900-1990) as they pertain to music . . . 1. The Sensual Plane: You’re aware of the music, but not engaged enough to have an opinion or judge it.2. The Expressive Plane: You become more engaged by paying attention, finding meaning beyond the music, and noticing how it makes you feel.3. The Musical Plane: You listen to the music with complete presence, noticing the musical elements of melody, harmony, pitch, tempo, rhythm, and form.

~ Susan C. Young

When you become an actively engaged listener, you will develop the mindful awareness that active listening involves multiple layers and distinct levels.

~ Susan C. Young

To make matters even more complicated, research has shown that we remember only 25-50 percent of what we hear. This inclination not only compromises our connection with another person, but we can fail to retain vital information. All this evidence demonstrates that it is imperative that we intentionally pay closer attention and strive to become an in-depth listener.

~ Susan C. Young

You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time.

~ M. Scott Peck