George Burns said this quote

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

~ George Burns

Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.

~ George Burns

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

~ George Burns

Money is the root of all evil.' Then we hear, 'A fool and his money are soon parted.' What are they talking about? If money is so evil, shouldn't it be, 'A wise man and his money are soon parted'? And another thing, how does a fool get money in the first place? I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them.

~ George Burns