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Ari Gold Quotes

Ari Gold quote from classy quote

Unless you're in an early seventies-era Eagles cover band, a founding member of a religious cult, or sleeping under a bridge in Seattle, lose the beard and get a haircut. Power doesn't have time for any form of hirsute hipster self expression.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Beard Funny Humor Power Rules To Rule By Success The Gold Standard Work

To be successful, you need friends. To be very successful, you need enemies.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Enemies Friends Success Successful

Don’t waste time worrying about work/life balance, or looking for your best self, sham “secrets” or any other snake oil being pushed by sloppy hippies who have never built a business, let alone a bankroll, or you will wake up 20 years from now poor, pissed off and primed for a midlife crisis.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Business Life Midlife Crisis Rules To Rule By The Gold Standard Work

Opportunities are like night owls. They like to streak naked and howl at the moon. A lot of success in life comes down to luck. So put yourself in a position to get lucky. Because you know what happens if you don't go out? Nothing.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Going Out Humor Inspirational Life Opportunity Rules To Live Byo Rule By The Gold Standard Work

Loving your work doesn’t mean finding a job you can tolerate for eight hours a day, but rather a job that gets you flying out of bed in the morning like a Jack Russell who just had a firecracker stuffed up his ass.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Eight Hours Job Life Rules To Rule By Success The Golden Standard Work

Fight, fight, fight and get that money, money, money. ’Cause happiness can’t buy even a nickel.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Fight Happiness Money Nickel Rules To Rule By Work

If you were to gather all the minutes wasted on insignificant, immaterial yik yak spent throughout the day and add them up, how much misspent time do you think you'd have? One hour? Two hours? Consider the sunk cost on that. It's unacceptable. One minute wasted is one minute too much.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Humor Inspirational Life Rules To Rule By Talk The Gold Standard Time Time Management Work

First, if you participate in Movember, fuck you. Second, if you want to raise money for prostate cancer (a noble cause), do it the old-fashioned way, by either begging for it or exerting yourself physically for donations. Sitting on your ass and letting nature take its course above your upper lip is not the same thing as running a 10K at a local high school or breaking out the set of power tools your dad gave you as a housewarming present collecting dust in your garage and using them to go out and build a habitat for humanity. Maybe I can raise money for rectal cancer by getting people to pledge a dollar every time I take a shit. And third no one wants to see that horrific seventies pornstache growing like a caterpillar with cerebral palsy zigzagging across your face; you look like you're about to go door to door informing people that you're a registered sex offender who's just moved in next door and would their kids like to come out and was your windowless van for a dollar?Fuck Movember. And November.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Beard Cancer Hilarious Movember November Rules To Rule By The Gold Standard

There's a reason caveman started to develop sophisticated tools before the meteor wiped them all out: It's so they could fucking shave. Do you know how frustrating it must have been to be hunched over all night trying to start a fire only to finally succeed just to have your beard go up in flames? No aloe vera back then.

~ Ari Gold

Ari Gold Ari Gold Beard Funny Grooming Hilarious Humor Rules To Rule By Shaving The Gold Standard
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