I smack myself in the forehead. “Holy priceless collection of Etruscan snoods, they’re not moving!” I exclaim. There’s a choking noise over my head somewhere. “Etruscan snoods?” I glow quietly inside. Some accomplishments mean more than others. I am officially the Shit. Now and forever. “Dude, watch your question marks. I just pried one out of you.” “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” “Admit it, you lost your eternal fecking composure.” “You have an obsession with a delusion about how I end my sentences. What the fuck are Etruscan snoods?” “Dunno. It’s just another of Robin’s sayings. Like, ‘Holy strawberries, Batman, we’re in a jam!’ ” “Strawberries.” “Or, ‘Holy Kleenex, Batman, it was right under our nose and we blew it!’

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Dani O Malley Fever Series Funny Iced Ryodan

I return my attention to the situation at hand and realize Reality—the impatient bitch—has made my decision for me. She does that a lot. You get busy planning your life, then it has the nerve to just go ahead and happen to you before you’re ready. Before you even get the chance to aim yourself right!

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Dani Fae Fight Iced Reality Series Urban Fantasy

Imagine a delicious glass of summer iced tea.Take a long cool sip. Listen to the ice crackle and clink.Is the glass part full or part empty?Take another sip.And now?

~ Vera Nazarian

Vera Nazarian Cold Cool Drink Drinking Empty Full Glass Half Half Empty Half Full Heat Hot Ice Iced Iced Tea Meditation Mood Optimist Pessimist Summer Tea

You both talk too much,” the kid says. “Shut up. Don’t make me tell you again.”We shut up, which I find hysterically funny.

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Christian Cold Dancer Dani Death Fae Human Humanity Humor Iced Ryodan Snow Urban Fantasy

Fine. Okay. I killed her. But I didn’t mean to. And I didn’t kill her, kill her.”“Oh, I see. As long as you didn’t kill her, kill her, then that’s okay.

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Christan Dani Dani O Malley Fae Humor Iced Sarcasm Urban Fantasy

Velvet looks horrified. “If you are fool enough to address King R’jan, you will do it thus and in no other manner! ‘My King, Liege, Lord, and Master, your servant begs you grant it leave to speak.’”“Wow. Totally delusionary there.”“Good luck with that,” Ryodan says. “She doesn't beg to speak, or do anything else. You can lock her up, down, and sideways and it’s never going to happen.”I beam at him. I had no idea he thought so highly of me.

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Dani O Malley Fae Fever Series Iced Mega Ryodan Seelie Sweet Unseelie

I’ve never paid any attention to time. Dancer says I’ve enjoyed a luxury most people never have. He hates clocks and watches and everything that has to do with time. He says people already have too many lost days and that most folks live in the past or the future but never the present, always saying stuff like “I’m unhappy because ‘X’ happened to me yesterday, or I’ll be happy again when ‘Y’ happens to me tomorrow.” He says time is the ultimate villain.

~ Karen Marie Moning

Karen Marie Moning Dancer Dani O Malley Enemy Fae Happiness Iced Life Time Urban Fantasy