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Deb Caletti Quotes

Deb Caletti quote from classy quote

That's what people do who love you. They put their arms around you and love you when you're not so lovable.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Family Friends Hugs Life Lovable Love People

It starts so young, and I'm angry about that. The garbage we're taught. About love, about what's romantic. Look at so many of the so-called romantic figures in books and movies. Do we ever stop and think how many of them would cause serious and drastic unhappiness after The End? Why are sick and dangerous personality types so often shown a passionate and tragic and something to be longed for when those are the very ones you should run for your life from? Think about it. Heathcliff. Romeo. Don Juan. Jay Gatsby. Rochester. Mr. Darcy. From the rigid control freak in The Sound of Music to all the bad boys some woman goes running to the airport to catch in the last minute of every romantic comedy. She should let him leave. Your time is so valuable, and look at these guys--depressive and moody and violent and immature and self-centered. And what about the big daddy of them all, Prince Charming? What was his secret life? We dont know anything about him, other then he looks good and comes to the rescue.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Books Garbage Heathcliff Jay Gatsby Love Men Movies Mr Darcy Prince Charming Rochester Romantic Romeo Time Waste

You've got to have someone who loves your body. Who doesn't define you, but sees you. Who loves what he sees. Who you don't have to struggle to be good enough for.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Good Enough Love Seeing Someone Struggle You

It's good to let God pick a man for you. We don't do so well when we pick them ourselves. They end up lipsticks in a drawer, all those wrong colors you thought looked so good in the package.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Choose Color God Life Lipstick Love Man Men Package Pick

When what you want is a relationship, and not a person, get a dog.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Companionship Dog Love Relationship Romance Truth

I shouldn't have to be a liar to make someone love me. I shouldn't be so afraid of losing someone that I'll do anything to make them stay.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Love

It took me years to figure out that upset was upset, and tumultuousness was not the same thing as passion. Love isn't drama.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Drama Love Passion Upset

This is what I know. Don't settle for 40, 50, or even 80 percent. A relationship-it shouldn't be too small or too tight or even a little scratchy. It shouldn't take up space in your closet out of guilty conscience or convenience or a moment of desire. Do you hear me? It shold be perfect for you. It should be lasting. Wait. wait for 100 percent.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Lasting Love Perfect Relationship Settling Too Small Too Tight Wait

I had always had a little problem looking out for myself in love. I was afraid people would leave me. So I sort of clung and did everything possible to keep someone around. I didn't have a hard talk with myself about who I was keeping around. Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. I clung to people like human life preservers. I thought i'd die if someone left me. Its ironic because now I'm the one who's leaving.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Change Inspirational Life Life Lessons Love Relationship

I've heard that people stand in bad situations because a relationship like that gets turned up by degrees. It is said that a frog will jump out of a pot of boiling water. Place him in a pot and turn it up a little at a time, and he will stay until he is boiled to death. Us frogs understand this.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Abuse Life Relationships

You can forget that other people carry pieces of your own story around in their heads. I've always thought--put together all those random pieces form everyone who's ever known you from your parents to the guy who once sat next to you on a bus, and you'd probably see a fuller version of your life than you even did while living it.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Life Profound

The magic of purpose and of love in its purest form. Not televison love, with its glare and hollow and sequined glint; not sex and allure, all high shoes and high drama, everything both too small and in too much excess, but just love. Love like rain, like the smell of a tangerine, like a surprise found in your pocket.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Life Love Magic Purpose Rain Surprise

Maybe it was wrong, or maybe impossible, but I wanted the truth to be one thing. One solid thing.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Truth

Truth was funny, because it was an insistent thing, maybe as powerful and insistent as some force of nature, the push of water or wind. You could keep it out only so long, but it had its own will and its own needs, and maybe you could keep it at bay with lies, but not for long, not for always.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Truth

I could forget that part, but it had to have been true.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Been But Forget Must Part Story That True Truth Us

Sometimes you can cattle rope your heart and sometimes you can't, is all.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Inspirational Love Romance Teenage Love

They say religion is about love, but you wonder how much of it really is about fear.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Fear Love Really Religion

We look down our noses at people who've made mistakes in relationships. She's so stupid! How could she do that! Our superiority makes us feel better. But I’d bet everything I have on the fact that people to claim to have a perfect record in love are either lying or have very limited dating experience. People who say, I’d never do that! Someday, unless you are very, very lucky, you’ll have a story to tell. Or not to tell.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Dating Love Mistakes Relationships

People can attach themselves to something--an idea, another person, a desire--with an impossibly strong grip, and in the case of restless ghosts, a grip stronger than death. Will is a powerful thing. Will--it's supposed to be a good treat, a more determined and persistent version of determination and persistence. But will and obsession--they sit right next to each other. They pretend to be strangers and all the while meet secretly at midnight. -

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Life Profound Relationships

Too often in my life, love has been defined as humiliation with occasional roses.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Inspirational Life Love Relationships

So I put up with bad behavior in the name of loving the way I thought you were supposed to love.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Change Inspirational Life Love Relationships

A relationship could be a place to hide too.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Relationship Relationships

What is it about hairdressers? You tell them 'not too short' and some part of their hairdresser brain hears this as 'whack the shit out of it.' If you never say, 'not too short,' everything is fine. You say it, & it's a guarantee you'll come out ready for the military>

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Funny

If time heals all wounds, and a book can hold a person's entire life, then you can speed up the process with a pulp time warp.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Books Healing Reading

We are thickly layered, page lying upon page, behind simple covers. And love - it is not the book itself, but the binding.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Books Life Love

Usually, I set one foot in a library and I feel my own internal volume lower. A library is a physical equivalent of a sigh. It’s the silence, sure, but it’s also the certainty of all those books, the way they stand side by side with their still, calm conviction. It’s the reassurance of knowledge in the face of confusion.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Books Libraries Reading

Sometimes good choices are really bad ones, wrapped up in so much fear you can't even see straight.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Choices Fear

The loneliness you feel with another person, the wrong person, is the loneliest of all.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Feel Loneliness Lonely People

And pity--people who inspire it in you are actually very powerful people. To get someone else to take care of you, to feel sorry for you--that takes a lot of strength, smarts, manipulation. Very powerful people.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Feel Manipulation People Pity Powerful Smarts Sorry Strength

People are secretive when they have secrets.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Deception People Secretive Secrets

Maybe a person's world can grow bigger in all the right ways, not too wide that it becomes shallow, just large enough to preserve its depth.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Bigger Depth Growing People Preserve Shallow World

I've wished for things and never really had the chance...It's time to stop dreaming and do something about it. You've got to know what you want, then...go.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Dreams Wishes

I love to see those paragliders weaving softly around Moon Point, their legs floating above you in the air. When they drift in for a landing, their feet touch the ground and they trot forward from the continued motion of the glider, which billows down like a setting sun. I never get tired of watching them and I've seen them thousands of times. I always wondered what that kind of freedom would feel like.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Air Freedom Paraglider Sun

It was more work than it seemed, looking through a telescope, as the Earth was continually moving and you had to move along with it. You don't realize how fast this acutally happens, and it's kind of both creepy and wonderful when you stop to think about it. And it makes you realize there's absolutely no way to avoid change. You can sit there and cross your arms and refuse it, but underneath you, things are still spinning away.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Change Reality

But what I wanted back had never really been there. He was a temporary illusion, a mirage of water after walking in the desert. I had made him up. And he could have killed me. You've got to stop the ride sometimes. Stop it and get off.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Attitude Change Inspirational Life Love

I used to think that finding the right one was about the man having a list of certain qualities. If he has them, we'd be compatible and happy. Sort of a checkmark system that was a complete failure. But I found out that a healthy relationship isn't so much about sense of humor or intelligence or attractive. It's about avoiding partners with harmful traits and personality types. And then it's about being with a good person. A good person on his own, and a good person with you. Where the space between you feels uncomplicated and happy. A good relationship is where things just work. They work because, whatever the list of qualities, whatever the reason, you happen to be really, really good together.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Attractive Checkmark Compatible Good Happy Harmful Healthy Intelligence List Partners Personality Qualities Reason Relationship Sense Of Humor

Rejection, though--it could make the loss of someone you weren't even that crazy about feel gut wrenching and world ending.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Crazy Feel Loss Pain Rejection Sad

The most basic and somehow forgettable thing is this: Love is not pain. Love is goodness. And real love--it's less shiny than solid and simple.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Basic Forgettable Goodness Love Pain Real Shiny Simple Solid

Marriage is like a well-built porch. If one of the two posts leans too much, the porch collapses. So each must be strong enough to stand on its own.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Collapses Marriage Stand Strong Two Well Built

Family was even a bigger word than I imagined, wide and without limitations, if you allowed it, defying easy definition. You had family that was supposed to be family and wasn't, family that wasn't family but was, halves becoming whole, wholes splitting into two; it was possible to lack whole, honest love and connection from family in lead roles, yet to be filled to abundance by the unexpected supporting players.

~ Deb Caletti

Deb Caletti Abundance Bigger Connection Family Limitations Love Unexpected Whole
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