Artemis Fowl Quotes

You know, Miss Holly, you look very dramatic like that, backlit by the fire. Very attractive, if I may say so. I know you shared a moment passionne with Artemis which he subsequently fouled up with his typical boorish behavior. Let me just throw something out there for you to consider while we're chasing the probe: I share Artemis's passion but not his boorishness. No pressure; just think about it.This was enough to elicit a deafening moment of silence even in the middle of a crisis, which Orion seemed to be blissfully unaffected by.

~ Eoin Colfer

Look! said Foaly, pointing with some urgency into the vast steel-gray gloom, Someone who cares!

~ Eoin Colfer

Orion brightened. I have an idea.Yes? said Foaly, daring to hope that a spark of Artemis remained.Why don't we look for some magic stones that can grant wishes? Or, if that doesn't work, you could search my naked body for some mysterious birthmark that means I am actually the prince of somewhere or other.

~ Eoin Colfer

Orion nodded, then asked, “Dwarf cheese?”“Cheese made by dwarfs.”“Oh,” said Orion, relieved. “They make it. It’s not actually . . .”“No. What a horrible thought.”“Exactly.

~ Eoin Colfer

The Theory of Evolution has more holes in it than a dam made out of Swiss cheese.

~ Eoin Colfer

Friendship isn't a science mudboy. Just do what you think is right.

~ Eoin Colfer

They were in a position of total ignorance and people in that position often died without being enlightened.

~ Eoin Colfer

Some people just needed to be stolen from.

~ Eoin Colfer

The humans were protecting their heritage, or so they thought. Strange that Mud Men seem more concerned about the past than the present.

~ Eoin Colfer

Certain battles were won by retreating.

~ Eoin Colfer

Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity?Artemis blinked. Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.

~ Eoin Colfer