Cats Quotes

Take it from catsIf someone moves to make room for you, take up more room. If someone is looking over there, there’s something to see. If somebody sneezes, run. If someone brings a bag into your home, look inside it. If you don’t want someone to leave, sit on his suitcase. Clean between your toes. Flaunt your full figure. Hide loose change. Even though you can take care of yourself, it’s okay to let someone be nice to you. It’s fine to take a nap on the laundry. If you stand in a kitchen long enough, someone will feed you. If you’re alone in bed, use all the pillows. Just because it’s gorgeous outside doesn’t mean you have to go outside. Just because you can fit into something tight doesn’t mean that you belong in it. If you trust someone, open yourself like a cheap umbrella. If you want to be left alone, park yourself in a closet. If you want to surprise someone, lie in a bathtub and then jerk back the curtain when he sits on the toilet. If you’re not interested, don’t look interested. You don’t have to chase every bird that you see.

~ Helen Ellis

God I have been - God I am. But quite frankly, sometimes it is all just a little too much for one small cat.

~ Paul Gallico

You also yell at the pigeons outside, watch too many cooking shows, and have a blog entirely dedicated to pictures of yourself.

~ Marie Jacquelyn

It is easy to make plans in this world, even a cat can do it, and when one is out in those remote oceans it is noticeable that a cat's plans and a man's are worth about the same.

~ Mark Twain

The cat required far less attendance than a human child, which is one of the reasons why spinster ladies prefer felines to babies.

~ Elizabeth Peters

It is said that in Ulthar, which lies beyond the river Skai, no man may kill a cat; and this I can verily believe as I gaze upon him who sitteth purring before the fire. For the cat is cryptic, and close to strange things which men cannot see. He is the soul of antique Aegyptus, and bearer of tales from forgotten cities in Meroë and Ophir. He is the kin of the jungle’s lords, and heir to the secrets of hoary and sinister Africa. The Sphinx is his cousin, and he speaks her language; but he is more ancient than the Sphinx, and remembers that which she hath forgotten.

~ H.p. Lovecraft

Some people scorn a cat and think it not an essential, but the Clemens tribe are not of these.

~ Mark Twain

There was a sort of gallery structure in the roof space which held a bed and also a bathroom which you could actually swing a cat in. But only if it was a reasonably patient cat and didn’t mind a few nasty cracks about the head.

~ Douglas Adams

I'm a cat. You know cat's don't like to go outside. They actually drop their smell all over a place, and that becomes their place. So when you live with a cat, you actually live at the cat's house.

~ Carla Bruni-Sarkozy

Once a cat loves you, it loves you till the end.

~ Will Advise

There are many intelligent beings in the Universe. Most of them are owned by cats.

~ Old Polish Proverb

Randall, the gay alcoholic in the house next door, boldly peeps through my windows. 'Boy, you sure rock in that chair a lot,' he said last week, his face pressed against my screen. This time I was lying on my bed with Katherine's cats. I'm watching them while she's out of town. I can be very mushy, and he watched me kissing them and saying that all the other cats in the neighborhood were jealous of their beauty.

~ David Sedaris

Er, excuse me,' said the man as Nanny Ogg turned away, 'but what is that on your shoulders?''It's. . . a fur collar,' said Nanny.'Excuse me, but I just saw it flick its tail.''Yes. I happen to believe in beauty without cruelty.

~ Terry Pratchett

Nell was like a witch. Her long silvery hair rolled into a bun on the back of her head, the narrow wooden house on the hillside in Paddington, with its peeling lemon-yellow paint and overgrown garden, the neighborhood cats that followed her everywhere. The way she had of fixing her eyes so straight on you, as if she might be about to cast a spell.

~ Kate Morton

Every cat knows how to keep his owner feeding them: You may scratch and bite ninety-nine times, but the hundredth time, you must leap into a lap and press your nose to their nose. Rules are for dogs.

~ Catherynne M. Valente

Cat herding is simple. Just drag a string behind you.

~ Aaron Dennis

As we all know, the spine ridges of adult cats are highly poisonous. If you are coming to see a kitten that you have adopted, it is important that you check for the location and severity of the spine ridge before attempting any petting. Also, keep your hands away from their mouths. A few of them have developed their venom sacks. We lost two cat adopters already this month, so...let's just be careful people.

~ Joseph Fink

Who shall tell the lady's griefWhen her Cat was past relief?Who shall number the hot tearsShed o'er her, beloved for years?Who shall say the dark dismayWhich her dying caused that day?

~ Christina Rossetti

For there is nothing sweeter than his peace when at rest.For there is nothing brisker than his life when in motion.

~ Christopher Smart

You idiot! She spat, flattening her ears. What are you doing in my territory?Drowning? Replied Graystripe. Can't you do that in your own territory? Ah, but who would rescue me there?

~ Erin Hunter

We lost track of which was which, but we were fairly sure that some of the creatures had been borne away still in the darkness of paganism, and that worried us a good deal.

~ Marilynne Robinson

You have a cat and go on vacation, you know who to call. Though, I warn you, I do both dry and wet food. I’m not into doin’ just wet or just dry. They need a treat, but they need to keep their teeth clean. It’s important.”-TexRock Chick

~ Kristen Ashley

Lardo was getting on in years, and his big belly tended to slow him down a bit.

~ Sarah Weeks

The domestic cat is a bit of a contradiction. It freely accepts human friendship while never allowing even the most contented life to dim its sense of who it is and what it is capable of.

~ Ellen Dugan

Everyone has noticed the taste which cats have for pausing and lounging between the two leaves of a half-shut door. Who is there who has not said to a cat, “Do come in!” There are men who, when an incident stands half-open before them, have the same tendency to halt in indecision between two resolutions, at the risk of getting crushed through the abrupt closing of the adventure by fate. The over-prudent, cats as they are, and because they are cats, sometimes incur more danger than the audacious.

~ Victor Hugo

Tramps and vagabonds have marks they make on gateposts and trees and doors, letting others of their kind know a little about the people who live at the houses and farms they pass on their travels. I think cats must leave similar signs; how else to explain the cats who turn up at our door through the year, hungry and flea-ridden and abandoned?

~ Neil Gaiman

We're cleaning cat ears.Rhonda doesn't require us to come in on Sundays, but somebody has to feed the animals. Yesterday Alex and I helped five cats and two dogs find homes...We agreed we probably could have placed a couple more cats if their ears were nice and pink inside like in the wet-food commercials. We told Rhonda to take a much-deserved break today and we'd come in, feed everybody, and make our cats a little more like the ones on TV.So I skipped church to clean cat ears.

~ Mindy Mcginnis

Today 5:14 p.m.Mrrrrrowl. Mrrrrrowl.Ow! Ow, stupid cat! Ahem. You told me, 'stop calling, Isabelle,' but I'm not the one calling you. Church is calling you. Mine are merely the fingers that work the phone.See, here's something you may not have known before you committed your recent rash acts. Our cat, Church, and your cat, Chairman Meow? They're in love. I've never seen such love before. I never knew such love could exist in the heart of a... cat. Some people say that love between two dude cats is wrong, but I think it's beautiful. Love makes Church happier than I've ever seen him. Nothing makes him happy like Chairman Meow. Not tuna. Not shredding centuries-old tapestries. Nothing. Please don't keep these cats apart. Please don't take the joy of love away from Church.Look, this is really just a warning for your own good. If you keep Church and Chairman Meow apart, Church will start to get angry.You wouldn't like Church when he's angry.Beep

~ Cassandra Clare

Having a bunch of cats around is good. If you're feeling bad, just look at the cats, you'll feel better, because they know that everything is, just as it is.

~ Charles Bukowski

Rowl felt sure that Bridget's fragile feelings would be crushed if he denied her the pleasure of sharing her meat with him.

~ Jim Butcher

Cats never weep, she told herself, no more than wolves. It's just a stupid dream.

~ George R.r. Martin

You can flip a coin but Schrodinger's pet cat will still be in that box.

~ Scott Edward Shjefte

Stuffed cats are able to creep more convincingly than live ones.

~ Günter Grass

Cats like keyboards, people like to explore and to discover new mysteries.

~ Deyth Banger

...I discovered a small kitten in the garden, which apparently had been abandoned by its mother. I picked it up and noticed that its hind legs were crippled in just the same way as Tsering's were when she died. I took this creature into my house and looked after it until eventually it was able to walk. Like Tsering, she was also female, but very beautiful and even more gentle. She also got along very well with the two dogs, particularly Sangye, against whose furry chest she liked to lie.

~ Dalai Lama Xiv

He might be living on mice, but Chesterton does not look like an animal who is governed by his appetites. He's an ascetic, if Cathbad ever saw one.

~ Elly Griffiths

I had a dog once. I thought so much of him that when he died I couldn't bear the thought of getting another in his place. He was a FRIEND—you understand, Mistress Blythe? Matey's only a pal. I'm fond of Matey—all the fonder on account of the spice of devilment that's in him—like there is in all cats. But I LOVED my dog. I always had a sneaking sympathy for Alexander Elliott about HIS dog. There isn't any devil in a good dog. That's why they're more lovable than cats, I reckon.

~ L.m. Montgomery

I wrote a book on cats. In retrospect, I should have used paper, cause chapter six got hit by a car.

~ Wynne Mclaughlin

Cats like sleeping and resting on intersections. There are many stories about magical animals but really, apart from the dragon, the cat is the only creature which can absorb the force. No one knows why a cat absorbs it and what it does with it...

~ Andrzej Sapkowski

The purr is very important. It's the purr that does it every time. It's the purr that makes up for the Things Under the Bed, the occasional pungency, the 4 a.m. yowl. Other creatures went in for big teeth, long legs or over-active brains, while cats just settled for a noise that tells the world they're feeling happy.

~ Terry Pratchett