Chick Lit Quotes

I knew it,” she snapped. “You’re no different from all men. You’re just another jerk pretending to be single! I didn’t wanna wrap a lie into a Christmas present anyway.

~ Maha Erwin

Two must rule together, one for the night and one for the day. this is the way it has always been done.

~ Jennifer Silverwood

Looks like my superpowers don’t come with automatic manicures, thank heaven. I hate long nails.

~ Jennifer Silverwood

Between dainty bites, she told Amie, 'Oh, you simply are as darling a creature as Henry described! I had no idea of your being so grown up! Henry, she is positively frazzleging!' Amie deepened her smile, saying, 'And I had no idea you would be so pretty either, madam.

~ Jennifer Silverwood

I am the Merlin, bane of the Vale, terror of the four lands. I am chaos and shadows, the last of my people.

~ Jennifer Silverwood

Veni, vidi, vici. That was easy for Julius Caesar to say; he crossed Italy in a chariot, not on a stupid bike. - Vivia

~ Leah Marie Brown

Of course I believe in hell. I have three brothers.

~ Lois Greiman

If you don't like your teeth, keep your mouth shut.

~ Lois Greiman

Maybe knowledge is power, but it ain't nearly as as satisfying as punching some smart ass in the chops.

~ Lois Greiman

Excuses are like butt holes everyone has 'em and they all stink.

~ Lois Greiman

If money don't buy happiness, what the hell does?

~ Lois Greiman

Matrimony and firefighting. They ain't for cowards.

~ Lois Greiman

What if there's no such thing as PMS, and this is just my personality?

~ Lois Greiman

You don't know many friends you have till you buy a big-ass house on the beach.

~ Lois Greiman

You guys gotta get a license to drive a Geo, but any doofus with a few good swimmers can be a father.

~ Lois Greiman

A friend is someone who will bike to the ice cream shop with you, even when you don't look so good.

~ Lois Greiman

Taxes for people with too much damned time on their hands.

~ Lois Greiman

Expect stupid. It's everywhere.

~ Lois Greiman

The trouble with insanity is it can flare up at the most inconvenient moments.

~ Lois Greiman

If men were necessary in the procreation process, they'd have gone the way of the dodo bird long ago.

~ Lois Greiman

I'd love to go out with you, but I'd hate to deprive some village of its idiot.

~ Lois Greiman

If at 1st you don't succeed, stretch out on your La-Z-Boy with a six-pack and a porn flick. Y' still won't succeed, but you sure as hell won't give a shift.

~ Lois Greiman

A person without regrets is called a corpse.

~ Lois Greiman

Sometimes it's nice to have a man around the house. But a dog will clean the dishes.

~ Lois Greiman

False hope is better than no hope at all.

~ Lois Greiman

All's well so long-as you don't get shot in the hind end with a twenty gauge.

~ Lois Greiman

I'm just an everyday kind of hero. If the everyday kind saves babies from burning buildings and looks hotter than hell in bunker gear.

~ Lois Greiman

A woman needs a man like a tuba needs a cucumber.

~ Lois Greiman

There are 2 kinds of people in the world. Those who enjoy a nice salami and those who have no souls.

~ Lois Greiman

A wedding is no way to begin a marriage.

~ Lois Greiman

When men age they're called sophisticated. When women age they ain't called at all.

~ Lois Greiman

If you don't scare the neighbors while copulating, I'm afraid you're doing something terribly wrong.

~ Lois Greiman

Apparently it takes, like, forty-seven muscles to frown. Flippin' the bird' s a hell of a lot easier.

~ Lois Greiman

Women have to be in the mood for sex. Men have to be breathing.

~ Lois Greiman

Love is like skydiving without a parachute.

~ Lois Greiman

Let us talk about oxymoron, common sense, for instance.

~ Lois Greiman

I've been a little cranky since that house fell on my sister.

~ Lois Greiman

A balanced diet and a brisk daily walk will help keep you healthy, but there's nothing like a good-looking young man with a nice butt to help up your cardiovascular system.

~ Lois Greiman

You are a perfect woman, a magical blend of beauty, intelligence, and spirit. Without you, my life is nothing.

~ Lois Greiman

Yeah, world peace would be all right, but what about a day off in a slab of ham the size of my head.

~ Lois Greiman