I believe a family just isn’t complete without skeletons. My dearest momma clean bit off my daddy’s nose right around the time they divorced.

~ Cole Alpaugh

Cole Alpaugh Fiction Literary Redneck Spy

Whenever I’d get howlin’ over something, he’d grab my ass up from wherever I was and head straight for the john. Momma said my head would get banged up along the way, but she said itwas probably bein’ dunked under water that made me stupid.

~ Cole Alpaugh

Cole Alpaugh Fiction Literary Novel Redneck

Finally, we entered Chetaube County, my imaginary birthplace, where the names of the little winding roads and minuscule mountain communities never failed to inspire me: Yardscrabble, Big Log, Upper, Middle and Lower Pigsty, Chicken Scratch, Cooterville, Felchville, Dust Rag, Dough Bag, Uranus Ridge, Big Bottom, Hooter Holler, Quickskillet, Buck Wallow, Possum Strut ... We always say a picture speaks a thousand words, but isn’t the opposite equally true?

~ Sol Luckman

Sol Luckman Adage Appalachia Backwoods Beat Birthplace Comedy Country Deep South Funny Heritage Humor Imaginal Imaginary Imagination Inheritance Picture Received Wisdom Redneck Redneck Humor Road Road Novel Roots Rural Saying South Southern Truism White Trash Words

True, beneath the human façade, I was an interloper, an alien whose ship had crashed beyond hope of repair in the backwoods of Southern Appalachia—but at least I’d learned to walk and talk enough like the locals to be rejected as one of their own.

~ Sol Luckman

Sol Luckman Alien Appalachia Backwoods Birthplace Comedy Country Et Extraterrestrial Funny Home Hometown Human Humanity Humor Identity Outcase Outsider Parody Redneck Rejection Satire South Southern Spaceship Ufo Wit

Get in here and make me some dinner—now, woman.News flash, Michael, you're supposed to be evil, not redneck!

~ Rachel Caine

Rachel Caine Eve Rosser Michael Glass Redneck Vampire

You think all I can do is frog legs? I got Legs on my mind, alright, but yours. I’ll do whatever it takes the save the ass on top of ‘em and everything else, you hear me?

~ A. Violet End

A. Violet End Erotica Humor Redneck

Well, fella, as much as I’d like to stick something up your ass, it ain’t gonna be my finger or anything else on my body—sorry to disappoint.

~ A. Violet End

A. Violet End Erotica Humor Redneck

How many of you were born in Oklahoma? Yeah, never raise your hand to a question like that again. We’re the mecca of beer-drinkin’ rednecks.

~ Bryant A. Loney

Bryant A. Loney Alcohol Beer Booze Oklahoma Redneck Rednecks

You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

~ Jeff Foxworthy

Jeff Foxworthy Truck You Redneck

If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck.

~ Jeff Foxworthy

Jeff Foxworthy Home You Redneck

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

~ Jeff Foxworthy

Jeff Foxworthy You Redneck Made