Jesus Quotes

As a young child I had Santa and Jesus all mixed up. I could identify Coke or Pepsi with just one sip, but I could not tell you for sure why they strapped Santa to a cross. Had he missed a house? Had a good little girl somewhere in the world not received the doll he’d promised her, making the father angry?” (p.3)

~ Augusten Burroughs

God stipulates in the Bible that Jesus Followers are to love and serve everyone regardless of their faith or lack of it. But, this does not require us to honour and respect their Biblically-heinous cultural practises like multiculturalism does!

~ Gary Patton

Perhaps [the critics are right and] the drama is played out now and Jesus is safely dead and buried. Perhaps. It is ironical and entertaining to consider that at least once in the world’s history those words might have been said with complete conviction, and that was on the eve of the Resurrection.

~ Dorothy L. Sayers

Could he have been the fork in the road American never took, the singular point she jumped the wrong way from? Suppose the Slothropite heresy had had the time to consolidate and prosper? Might there have been fewer crimes in the name of Jesus, and more mercy in the name of Judas Iscariot? It seems to Tyrone Slothrop that there might be a route back--maybe that anarchist he met in Zurich was right, maybe for a little while all the fences are down, one road as good as another, the whole space of the Zone cleared...

~ Thomas Pynchon

In medieval times, contrary to popular belief, most knights were bandits, mercenaries, lawless brigands, skinners, highwaymen, and thieves. The supposed chivalry of Charlemagne and Roland had as much to do with the majority of medieval knights as the historical Jesus with the temporal riches and hypocrisy of the Catholic Church, or any church for that matter. Generally accompanied by their immoral entourage or servants, priests, and whores, they went from tourney to tourney like a touring rock and roll band, sports team, or gang of South Sea pirates. Court to court, skirmish to skirmish, rape to rape. Fighting as the noble's substitution for work.

~ Tod Wodicka

Jesus taught in parables for a reason.

~ Stuart Connelly

It is such a letdown to rise from the dead and have your friends not recognize you.

~ Rob Bell

We live in a Jesus haunted culture that is Biblically illiterate, and so unfortunately at this point in time, almost anything can pass for knowledge of the historical Jesus from notions that he was a a Cynic sage to ideas that he was a Gnostic guru to fantasies that he didn't exist, to Dan Browne's Jesus of hysterical (rather than historical) fiction.

~ Ben Witherington Iii

He [Jesus] had a terrible temper, you know, undoubtedly inherited from His Father.

~ Robertson Davies

The law provides expert diagnosis of our sin problem, but the law does not provide the cure to our sin problem. Only Jesus can!

~ John Paul Warren

We are children, perhaps, at the very moment when we know that it is as children that God loves us - not because we have deserved his love and not in spite of our undeserving; not because we try and not because we recognize the futility of our trying; but simply because he has chosen to love us. We are children because he is our father; and all of our efforts, fruitful and fruitless, to do good, to speak truth, to understand, are the efforts of children who, for all their precocity, are children still in that before we loved him, he loved us, as children, through Jesus Christ our lord.

~ Frederick Buechner

Promising paradise or threatening hell-fire is, we assumed, generally admitted to be unproductive. It is based upon a fundamental fraud which, when discovered, turns the individual against society and nourishes the very thing it tries to stamp out. What Jesus offered in return of loving one's enemies was heaven on earth, better known as peace of mind.

~ B.f. Skinner

If Jesus was a bartender, He would still only be half as cool as Carlos.

~ Richard Kadrey

In 30 years Christians will have baptized their picture of Christ. He won't be a nice, banal, meek, and bearded man with softly permed hair. Instead, he will fill our imaginations more solidly, more invasively , more unexpectedly. Christ will become That Man who changes people, someone who jumps off a bumper sticker and mediocre praise songs and into lives.

~ Jonalyn Fincher

The severest trial of oppression is the constant outrage which one suffers at the thought of the oppressor. What Jesus discovered was how to avoid the inner devastations. His technique was to practice the opposite emotion... [a man] may not get his freedom or possessions back, but he's less miserable. It's a difficult lesson.

~ B.f. Skinner

Lord, forgive us for the times we have read about Gethsemane with dry eyes.

~ Frederick S. Leahy

Forget, too, the lamb-y, metaphor-male, the groinless, bourgeois Jesus, with his Easter-egg, candy-store-window eyes ogling the cruciform crosspiece of his eyebrows. If you meet such a Christ on the way, kill him. Do you wish to love? Do you wish to love? Leave love. Love nothing. Life is dark; life is dark at the no-place of the shocked heart cut two by the bone-handled, thrice-bladed Word.

~ Tim Lilburn

[C]ontinence is a very important part of yoga. If a handful of people come forward with strong wills, nothing is impossible. One Buddha changed half the globe; one Jesus, three quarters of the world. We all have that capacity. (140)

~ Swami Satchidananda

He was without any comforts of God — no feeling that God loved him — nofeeling that God pitied him — no feeling that God supported him. God was hissun before — now that sun became all darkness… He was without God — hewas as if he had no God. All that God had been to him before was taken fromhim now. He was Godless — deprived of his God. He had the feeling of thecondemned, when the Judge says: “Depart from me, ye cursed,” “who shallbe punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord andfrom the glory of his power.” He felt that God said the same to him. Ah! This isthe hell which Christ suffered. The ocean of Christ’s sufferings isunfathomable… He was forsaken in the [place] of sinners. If you close with himas your surety, you will never be forsaken… “My God, my God, why hast thouforsaken me?” [The answer?] For me — for me.

~ Robert Murray Mccheyne

Jesus - “the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily” (Colossians 2:9).

~ John Piper

We must acknowledge that all we have are, at times very differing, interpretations of what Jesus was all about-and these interpretations, as they are collected in the New Testament, have been written in particular situations by men, none of whom questioned the existing patriarchal structure of their societies or of their communities. While some Christ-believing women did challenge certain male-dominated aspects of their church gatherings (see 1 Cor 14:33b-36) it is quite unlikely that they questioned the patriarchal structure of their society, community, and church on a fundamental level. ~ Werner Kahl in Reading Other-Wise, p. 151

~ Gerald O. West

Judas said, Master, as you have listened to all of them, now also listen to me. For I have seen a great vision. And when Jesus heard this, he laughed and said to him, You thirteenth daimon, why do you try so hard? But speak up, and I shall bear with you.

~ Rodolphe Kasser

New Labour leader Ed Miliband announces plan to 'make this party slightly less unelectable by 2015'. He added: 'I am Ed, the Almighty One.'Defeated brother David Miliband overheard muttering: 'Now I know how Wayne Christ felt after little Jesus came along.

~ Andy Zaltzman

Master, take me in along with these people. Jesus answered and said, Your star has led you astray, Judas.

~ Rodolphe Kasser

I do not believe that any man can preach the gospel who does not preach the Law. Lower the Law and you dim the light by which man perceives his guilt; this is a very serious loss to the sinner rather than a gain; for it lessens the likelihood of his conviction and conversion. I say you have deprived the gospel of its ablest auxiliary [its most powerful weapon] when you have set aside the Law. You have taken away from it the schoolmaster that is to bring men to Christ. they will never accept grace till they tremble before a just and holy Law. Therefore, the Law serves a most necessary purpose, and it must not be removed from its place. The Law cuts into the core of evil, it reveals the seat of the malady and informs us that the leprosy lies deep within. They must be slain by the Law before they can be made alive by the gospel.

~ Charles Spurgeon

Since the beginning of time, the ignorant have always screamed the loudest...They celebrated their intolerance as proof of their convictions. Now after all these years, mankind had finally managed to utterly erode everything that had once been so beautiful about Jesus.

~ Dan Brown

Therefore you too have grief now; but I will see you again, and your heart will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you.

~ Jesus Christ

I have never quite managed to see how we can make sense of the sacramental life of the Church without a theology of the risen body; and I have never managed to see how to put together such a theology without belief in the empty tomb. If a corpse clearly marked ‘Jesus of Nazareth’ turned up, I should save myself a lot of trouble and become a Quaker.

~ Rowan Williams

If I think God’s aim is to produce rule-followers, spiritual growth will always be an obligation rather than a desire of my heart.

~ John Ortberg

After Jesus' fast, he began healing, rescuing, redeeming. The Spirit filled up the emptiness Jesus created, launching him into ministry. In some supernatural way the abstinence from food was the catalyst for Jesus' unveiling; the real fireworks were next.

~ Jen Hatmaker

Pray. Smile. Repeat.

~ Victoria Barnes

If Jesus was willing to be beaten and tortured to gain the salvation of mankind, the least we can do is tell them about it.

~ Evan Minton

Dear God, I don’t ask for fame and fortune but for an opportunity to embrace many. I don’t ask you to make my life perfect but full of love. With every mistake I make, or with any success I have, I ask to feel your grace along the way, for the rest of my life. In Jesus’s name, amen.

~ Ron Baratono

One Tree is of life, the other is of death. Do our fruits hang from the bad tree, or the good? Only by testing the fruits of a Tree (or, rather, testing ourselves) can we truly see what kind of tree we are!

~ Ted Roberts

To place Jesus Christ in the class of mystics is an insult to the Highest.

~ Paul Bamikole

I marvel at how out of place simple, humble Jesus would be in today's American churches.

~ Jen Hatmaker

We don’t just learn facts, but we learn a Face. We’re not just learners of principles, but of a Person. We are lifelong learners in relationship with Jesus as we hear his voice in his word and have his ear in prayer, and share in community with his body, all through the power of his Spirit.

~ David Mathis

It is indeed true that when the Word becomes flesh in the here and now it changes us.

~ Jenni Jessen

One thing God has been showing me is that I'm not called to save the world, just to point those He places in my life towards the right way.

~ J.r. Rim

Dear God, let me find calm in every situation. Let me look at others with pity instead of anger. Let me pray they make it through life’s fog they’ve created for themselves and find you. In Jesus’s name, amen.

~ Ron Baratono