Joan Bauer Quotes

Ellie: You could lie to me. You could tell me to be encouraged, that good will triumph over evil.Richard: Good will triumph over evil.Ellie: Liar.

~ Joan Bauer

People are so cheap. Everyone wants quality, no one wants to pay for it. Here's the suburban dream-- to hire great workers who are such meek morons that they don't have the guts to ask for a living wage.

~ Joan Bauer

It's like getting an extraordinary meal after you've been eating junk food for a long time. The taste just sweeps through your sensibilities, bringing all-out contentment, and the sheer goodness of it makes up for every bad meal you ever had.

~ Joan Bauer

Mom has the Touch. She knows what flowers go with what occasions, what hors d'oeuvres work with what people. She believes passionately in the power of food to heal, restore, and stimulate relationships, and she has built a following of loyal customers who really hope she's right. If she's wrong, says Sonia, no one wants to know.

~ Joan Bauer

Revenge of the Giant Grill Man.

~ Joan Bauer

My grandma always said that God made libraries so that people didn't have any excuse to be stupid.

~ Joan Bauer

When you listen to G. T. Stoop, you understand the importance of being a honorable person, you get charged to fight for the truth, you get angry that so many politicians are playing games with people's trust.

~ Joan Bauer

I flopped on the overstuffed kitchen couch and watched him go. I wondered what would happen to all his films and photographs in the upstairs closet - the documentaries on homelessness and drug addiction, the funny short subjects, the half-finished romantic comedy, the boxes of slice-of-life photographs that spoke volumes about the human condition. I wondered how you stop caring about what you've ached over, sweated over. (Thwonk)

~ Joan Bauer

You don't understand the power of loss when it first hits you like a baseball coming fast from an out-of-control pitcher....It's the third day after an injury when the pain really starts to throb.

~ Joan Bauer

Woe unto you when all men speak well of you.

~ Joan Bauer

When you have something so important, something that you'll stay awake for, something you know that you were designed to do, well, it's worth getting a few dark circles, don't you think?

~ Joan Bauer

What kind of kids live in Mulhoney, Wisconsin? Would they like me? Would I like them? Have they ever eaten sushi? That's usually how I determine food sophistication. Maybe a personal ad would get the ball rolling:Insightful, hardworking, 16-year-old girl, emotionally generous and witty, seeks friend/pal/chum to while away meaningful hours. Picky eaters need not reply.

~ Joan Bauer

It was bad enough not having a boyfriend for New Year's Eve. Now I had to cope with Valentine datelessness, feeling consummate social pressure from every retailer in America who stuck hearts and cupids on their windows by January second to rub it in. (Thwonk)

~ Joan Bauer

You don't mince words.Just garlic.

~ Joan Bauer

a man who was, as we say in the restaurant business, one taco short of a combo platter.

~ Joan Bauer

On cheap tippers:Don't take it personally; they were deprived somehow as children.On low-fat entrees: They sell well enough, but nobody's too happy after the meal.

~ Joan Bauer

I'm working hard to have a good life.You don't need fancy things to feel good. You can hug a puppy. You can buy a can of paint and surround yourself with color. You can plant a flower and watch it grow. You can decide to trust people, the right people. You can decide to start over and let other people start over, too.

~ Joan Bauer

You think all teenagers care about are musicians and movie stars?Spend some time in Wisconsin.We'll blow your socks off.

~ Joan Bauer

Now I see that it isn't the problems along the way that make us or break us. It's how we learn to stand and face them that makes the difference.

~ Joan Bauer

We've got so much in this life that all we know how to do is want more. So we concentrate on the wrong things--things we can see--as being the measure of a person. We think if we win something big or buy something snazzy it'll make us more than we are. Our hearts know that's not true, but the eyes are powerful. It's easier to fix on what we can see than listen to the still, small voice of a whispering heart.

~ Joan Bauer

You know where we got stuck? We were looking for faithfull, loving and perfect relationships-males who were always glad to see us. So? We already have that! What do you mean? We've got dogs!

~ Joan Bauer

I nearly tripped over Stieglitz, my dog, a forty-pound black-and-white keeshond (pronounced caze-hawnd) furball. He lunged at me with unbridled glee because the mere sight of my presence always made his day. It's important to have a dog. Dogs love unconditionally. (Thwonk)

~ Joan Bauer

Guys don't understand great art. They don't care that sometimes the camera has power beyond the photographer to record emotion that only the heart can see. They're threatened when the camera jumps ahead of me. Todd Kovich was pissed when I brought my Nikon to the prom, but I'd missed too many transcendent shots over the years to ever take a chance of missing one again. A prom, I told him, had a boundless supply of photogenic bozos who could be counted on to do something base.

~ Joan Bauer

Life and death played out before my very eyes. You don't see these things if you clean your room regularly.

~ Joan Bauer

It was February sixth: eight days until Valentine's Day. I was dateless, as usual, deep in the vice grip of unrequited love. It was bad enough not having a boyfriend for New Year's Eve. Now I had to cope with Valentine datelessness, feeling consummate social pressure from every retailer in America who stuck hearts and cupids in their windows by January second to rub it in.

~ Joan Bauer

Mom put dense cheddar bread into a bag for a man who said this was his wife's favorite - he'd driven all the way from New Jersey to buy it because today was their anniversary. Several women in the store jabbed their husbands on hearing this. I hung my head - Peter Terris wouldn't cross the street to buy me a Twinkie.

~ Joan Bauer

Sometimes it takes a lot of courage to be who you are.

~ Joan Bauer

But then Macon smiled at me. Just be yourself, Foster. That's the best thing in the world.

~ Joan Bauer

When the going gets tough, the tough get a librarian.

~ Joan Bauer