Death Quotes

For my family to go on living the way they are living now I can't just die. I've got to die accidentally.

~ Anonymous

Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

~ Mark Twain

The trouble with life in the fast lane is that you get to the other end in an awful hurry.

~ John Jensen

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set.

~ Harold Macmillan

I won't mind dying if I can tell St. Peter a joke he hasn't heard.

~ Red Skelton

My mother always said that every time you do a good deed here on Earth you're storing up a treasure in heaven. Which means Mother Teresa's probably got some beachfront property up there and I'm up to a box of Milk Duds and a Pez dispenser.

~ Robert G. Lee

Why this fuss about death? Use your imagination try to visualize a world without death.

~ Charlotte Gilman

Ninety percent of living is just showing up.

~ Woody Allen

Everybody's gotta die sometime. That's life.

~ Archie Bunker

Planned obsolescence isn't a new idea - God always used it with people.

~ Robert Orben

I want to die like my grandfather died . . . peacefully in his sleep. Not like the other three people screaming in the car.

~ Joey Adams

I don't want to put my life in the hands of any doctor who believes in reincarnation. Give me a good old-fashioned American doc who'll make sure you live to pay that bill.

~ Glen Super

The only thing I regret about my life is the length of it. If I had to live my life again I'd make all the same mistakes - only sooner.

~ Tallulah Bankhead

Life doesn't imitate art it imitates bad television.

~ Woody Allen

When fate's got it in for you there's no limit to what you may have to put up with.

~ Georgette Heyer

I do not believe in an afterlife although I am bringing a change of underwear.

~ Woody Allen

He wasn't one who wanted to look back on his life and say I wish I spent more time in the office.

~ Anonymous

Being of sound mind I spent every cent I ever had.

~ Anonymous

If life was fair Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

~ Johnny Carson

The best way to get praise is to die.

~ Italian Proverb

No matter how rich you become how famous or powerful when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather.

~ Michael Pritchard

I'm not afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

~ Woody Allen

Life is like a B-movie. You don't want to leave in the middle of it but you don't want to see it again.

~ Ted Turner

If you don't go to people's funerals they won't come to yours.

~ Anonymous

Life is something that happens to you while you're making other plans.

~ Margaret Miller

Life is not a dress rehearsal.

~ Rose Tremain

St. Teresa of Avila described our life in this world as like a night in a second-class hotel.

~ Malcolm Muggeridge

If your time hasn't come not even a doctor can kill you.

~ M. A. Perlstein

I know a man who gave up smoking drinking sex and rich food. He was healthy right up to the time he killed himself.

~ Johnny Carson

Death is just nature's way of telling you to slow down.

~ Dick Sharpies

I could hear it from far away, that sound which only very big cities can produce: a sound consisting of all sounds rolled into one: the hum of voices and the cries of animals, bells ringing and the chink of coins, children's laughter and hammers beating metal, knives and forks clattering and a thousand doors slamming - the grandiose sound of life, of birth and death, itself.

~ Walter Moers

Love me, and I will laugh for you, and if you can make me laugh, my laughter will, quite simply, ransom the whole of the world from death.

~ Catherynne M. Valente

Fear of death is fear of surrender to Infinity. Learn to surrender, to exist at Infinity while alive, and fear of death dissolves. Fear of death is fear of the Unknown. Realize the Wonder, the Eternal Unknowability of the Totality of Existence, and fear of death is transcended. If happiness or freedom depends on the Answer to the Question, then there can be no happiness or freedom. The Question cannot be satisfactorily or finally Answered. For one who abides at Infinity, happy and free, at ease with his Ultimate Ignorance, the Question and the Answer are equally unnecessary. What began will come to an end. What is Wonderful is not threatened. The Process of the Totality of Existence is Transcendental and Eternal. Only a fraction of the Whole can pass away in any moment, since only a fraction of the Whole appears in any moment. Therefore, the Heart Itself is always already Full of Wonder and Love. I is the body-mind, the fraction of the Whole that is now appearing and will soon disappear. I must be surrendered to the Heart, to the Whole, which is Infinity, Wonder, and Love.

~ Adi Da Samraj

A forced contemplation of the heavens, crisp and angelic blue, a classic prelude to death.

~ Rachel Kushner

JD/Dr Cox: The second you start blaming yourself for people's deaths, there's no coming back.

~ Bill Lawrence

When something horrible happens, it's human nature to want to blame it on someone. We want someone to be held accountable, even though sometimes things just happen.

~ Meg Cabot

It's almost relaxing to know I'll die fairly soon, as it's a comfort not to obsess about my next orgasm.

~ Donald Hall

The obsession with the afterlife is born of a panic at not having memories of a before-life.

~ Dean Cavanagh

Whether vampires should have been declared ‘alive’ and full citizens of the United States of America was one of the big debates ranking right up there with gun rights and abortion. In a way all of them are about life and death—defining what life is, and what it isn’t, and how far we’ll go to protect, or take, it.

~ Laurell K. Hamilton

live a death, die a death

~ Aporva Kala