Famous Quotes

Hate. Huh. He'd never hated himself. If anything, he'd always liked himself a little too much. Once, a human female had even accused him of picturing his own face while he climaxed. He hadn't denied it, either, and next time he'd slept with her, he'd made sure to scream, Strider at the pivotal moment. --Strider, keeper of the demon of Defeat--

~ Gena Showalter

I have nightmares about hell, where all I do is add up numbers and try to have conversations with people like you.

~ Jim Butcher

Don't call me a dinosaur. It isn't fair to the dinosaurs. What did a dinosaur ever do to you?

~ Jim Butcher

Kalle Fucking Blomkvist

~ Stieg Larsson

An Assassin, a real Assassin, had to look like one - black clothes, hood, boots, and all. If they could wear any clothes, any disguise, then what could anyone do but spend all day in a small room with a loaded crossbow pointed at the door?

~ Terry Pratchett

It's awful to be rich and mind-boggingly handsome and have women fawn over you. My heart bleeds for you. Poor dear, how do you manage?

~ Ilona Andrews

Sunshine, I... Starla's voice broke off as she entered the room and caught sight of him standing naked in the corner. She eyed him in an odd, detached way, as if he were an interesting piece of furniture.Talon and modesty were strangers, but the way she stared at him made him damned uncomfortable. In spite of the sunlight, Talon grabbed the pink blanket off the bed and clutched it to his middle.You know, Sunshine, you need to find a man like that to marry. Someone so well hung that even after three or four kids, he'd still be wall to wall.Talon gaped.Sunshine laughed. Starla, you're embarrassing him.

~ Sherrilyn Kenyon

And there was that poor sucker Flaubert rolling around on his floor for three days looking for the right word.

~ Dorothy Parker

He was dressed just like on TV, with lots of silver chains and bracelets, ripped jeans, and a black muscle shirt (Which was kind of stupid, since he didn't have any muscles).

~ Rick Riordan

To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, I wish I had known this some time ago.

~ Roger Zelazny

I was never really certain why he scared the bejesus out of me. Nothing scared me growing up. I’ve been playing with dead people since the day I was born, so it’s good thing, yet the Big Bad scared me. Which brings me to the reason I called.” “Which was to give me nightmares for the rest of my life?” “Oh, no, that’s just a plus. Why was I so scared of him?” “Hon, for one thing he was this powerful, massive, black smokelike being.”“So, you’re saying I’m a racist?

~ Darynda Jones

What would a racist call werewolves? Wargs? She kind of liked that one, but suspected that racist bastards didn't read Tolkien.

~ Patricia Briggs

I've learned that it doesn't matter how your husband squeezes the toothpaste, the important thing is how he squeezes you.

~ H. Jackson Brown Jr.

Get me outa here. F*ckin' creepy cheerleaders.

~ Lisa Mcmann

How’s Her Royal Bitchiness?” “Alive.” “Pity.

~ Nalini Singh

The hand on my hair moved to my back, and I realized someone was singing softly. The voice was familiar, and something about it made my chest ache. Well, that was to be expected. Angels' songs would be awfully poignant. 'I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met you...' the voice crooned. I frowned. Was that really an appropriate song for the Heavenly Host to be--

~ Rachel Hawkins

I am no fan of books. And chances are, if you're reading this, you and I share a healthy skepticism about the printed word. Well, I want you to know that this is the first book I've ever written, and I hope it's the first book you've ever read. Don't make a habit of it.

~ Stephen Colbert

By Aladdin's lamplit scrotum, man! Everything is a story. What is there but stories? Stories are the only truth.

~ Christopher Moore

It was a trap after all,” Alric said. He turned to Royce. “My apologies for doubting your sound paranoia.

~ Michael J. Sullivan

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

~ P.g. Wodehouse

College is the best time of your life. When else are your parents going to spend several thousand dollars a year just for you to go to a strange town and get drunk every night?

~ David Wood

. . I tell you Dain is a splendid catch. I advise you to set your hooks and reel him in.”Jessica took a long swallow of her cognac. “This is not a trout, Genevieve. This is a great, hungry shark.”“Then use a harpoon.

~ Loretta Chase

She wished, as almost all kids wish at one point or another, that she could turn into a pterodactyl and fly away and never come back.

~ Gina Damico

No. Absolutely not.''Simon,' she said. 'It’s a perfectly fine plan.''The plan where you follow Jace and Sebastian off to some unknown dimensional pocket and we use these rings to communicate so those of us over here in the regular dimension of Earth can track you down? That plan?''Yes.''No,' he said. 'No, it isn’t.'Clary sat back. 'You don’t just get to say no.''This plan involves me! I get to say no! No.''Simon—'Simon patted the seat beside him as if someone were sitting there. 'Let me introduce you to my good friend No.

~ Cassandra Clare

Fuck! Is one expected to be a gentleman when one is stiff?

~ Marquis De Sade

Age is always advancing and I'm fairly sure it's up to no good.

~ Jim Butcher

I wanted to stay this way forever.Which, it turns out, was exactly five more minutes.

~ Kami Garcia

Another night then,' Mom said. 'Maybe on the weekend we can have a barbecue and invite your sister.' 'Or,' I said turning to Rafe, 'if you want to skip the whole awkward meet-the-family social event you could just submit your life story including your view on politics religion and every social issue imaginable along with anything else you think they might need to conduct a thorough background check.' Mom sighed. 'I really don't know why we even bother trying to be subtle around you.' 'Neither do I. It's not like he isn't going to realize he's being vetted as daughter-dating material.' Rafe grinned. 'So we are dating.' 'No. You have to pass the parental exam first. It'll take you awhile to compile the data. They'd like it in triplicate.' I turned to my parents. 'We have Kenjii. We have my cell phone. Since we aren't yet officially dating I'm sure you'll agree that's all the protection we need.' Dad choked on his coffee.

~ Kelley Armstrong

Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.

~ W.c. Fields

Alanna: All I know is that I'm to jump when I'm told and I have no free time.

~ Tamora Pierce

Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.

~ Tallulah Bankhead

Mogi: Greg Parker left the hideout a while ago and bought a large amount of food. He's heading back to the hideout now. And I've been able to ascertain that he purchased multiple boxes of the same brand chocolate.Aizowa: That clinches it.Ide: It feels a little strange that chocolate is the deciding factor here.

~ Tsugumi Ohba

All writers should be put in a box and thrown in the sea.

~ Gordon B. Hinckley

Literary detection and firearms don't really go hand in hand, pen mighter than the sword and so forth.

~ Jasper Fforde

This is the problem with forever friends. They know too much.

~ Kristin Hannah

If you're going to sit on someone's tombstone, you might as well know something about them, right?

~ Nicholas Sparks

Is there a particular reason you keep biting vampires?Will touched the dried blood on his wrists, and smiled. They don't expect it.Of course they don't. They know what happens when one of us consumes vampire blood. They probablyexpect you to have more sense.That expectation never seems to serve them very well, does it?

~ Cassandra Clare

Eve: “If you ended up naked and dead with another woman, I'd do the Rumba on your corpse.”Roarke: “You can't do the Rumba.”Eve: “I'd take lessons first.”Roarke: “You might very well. Not that you'll ever get the chance, but you'd also grieve.” Eve: “Wouldn't give you the satisfaction. You cheating f-wit putz. Roarke: “You'd weep in the dark and call my name.”Eve: “Call your name alright. How are things in hell? You dickless bastard. And I'd laugh and laugh, that's how I''d call your name.”Roarke: “Christ Jesus Eve, I love you.”--Eve, Roarke

~ J.d. Robb

About three things I was absolutely certain. First, Edwart was most likely my soul mate, maybe. Second, there was a vampire part of him -- which I assumed was wildly out of his control -- that wanted me dead. And third, I unconditionally, irrevocably, impenetrably, heterogeneously, gynecologically, and disreputably wished he has kissed me.

~ The Harvard Lampoon

Hatori: SHIGURE... I WILL TELL EVERYONE IN THE PUBLISHING INDUSTRY EVERYTHING I KNOW ABOUT YOU, STARTING FROM WHEN YOU WERE FOUR YEARS OLD...Shigure: Sorry, Tohru-kun. My lips are sealed!

~ Natsuki Takaya