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Humor Quotes

Humor quote from classy quote

Everything is, the way it is, for a reason. Or it isn't. Or neither. Or both. It's so hard to tell. It's so hard to tell you're a mile away by the Luke in your eye.

~ Alistair Mcharg

Alistair Mcharg Bipolar Disorder Humor Manic Depresion Recovery Word Association

College is fun as long as you don't die.

~ Tsugumi Ohba

Tsugumi Ohba College Fun Humor

Who are they?” I whispered, as we took seats opposite each other.Scout glanced up as she pulled notebooks and books from her bag. “The dragon ladies. They monitor lights-out, watch us while we study, and generally make sure that nothing fun occurs on their watch.”“Awesome,” I said, flipping open my trig book. “I’m a fun hater myself.

~ Chloe Neill

Chloe Neill Fun Humor

If I can't be remembered as one of the greatest authors, why not be remembered as the sexiest writer...

~ Hans Lindor

Hans Lindor Fun Humor Inspirational

Life is brighter on the lighter side.

~ L.m. Fields

L.m. Fields Fun Humor Inspirational

We could call it Herbie. And when she reaches adolescence, and goes boy-crazy, we can say Herbie Goes Bananas to each other over and over again, as you build the doorless turret we can lock her in.(Caitlin Moran to her husband on what to call her daughter's vagina)=> :o))

~ Moran

Moran Fun Humor Thoughtfulness Weirdness

...the only thing that could justify your continuing existence on the planet would be if you started breathing carbon dioxide and exhaling oxygen.

~ Yrsa Sigurðardóttir

Yrsa Sigurðardóttir Exasperation Fun Humor Insults Respectful Anger

Day dreaming is actually research for the next book.

~ Val Richards

Val Richards Fun Humor Writing

Sunday is always one of those days when you don’t feel bad that it has arrived.

~ Pulkit Patel

Pulkit Patel Fun Humor

A friend comes over with a Ouija board.It spells out: Bourbon. Where’s the band?Just because you’re dead doesn’t mean you can’t have fun.

~ Kelli Russell Agodon

Kelli Russell Agodon Alcohol Bourbon Death Drink Fun Ghost Humor Ouija

He glared at Mr. Diddley’s yellow-toothed smile, and thought how he’d like to shove a toothbrush in his mouth and teach him how to use it.

~ Justin Swapp

Justin Swapp Fun Humor Teeth The Magic Shop

Live the message, don't just read about it and preach.

~ Dennis M. (Pap) Dupuis

Dennis M. (Pap) Dupuis Fun Humor

Unicorns are not real, though we still dream about them! DREAM ON!

~ Lindsey Johnson

Lindsey Johnson Fun Humor Random

What life is to humor, humor is to life.

~ Krishna Sagar

Krishna Sagar Fun Humor Inspiration

The only things known to go faster than ordinary light is monarchy, according to the philosopher Ly Tin Weedle. He reasoned like this: you can't have more than one king, and tradition demands that there is no gap between kings, so when a king dies the succession must therefore pass to the heir instantaneously. Presumably, he said, there must be some elementary particles -- kingons, or possibly queons -- that do this job, but of course succession sometimes fails if, in mid-flight, they strike an anti-particle, or republicon. His ambitious plans to use his discovery to send messages, involving the careful torturing of a small king in order to modulate the signal, were never fully expanded because, at that point, the bar closed.

~ Terry Pratchett

Terry Pratchett Fantasy Fun Humor Mort Science

Art has one purpose, that is to leave you changed. Love has one purpose, that is to create art.

~ Julieanne O'connor

Julieanne O'connor Art Fun Heart Humor Inspiration Love Relationships

The notion that inspired play (even when audacious, offensive, or obscene) enhances rather than diminishes intellectual vigor and spiritual fulfillment, the notion that in the eyes of the gods the tight-lipped hero and the wet-cheeked victim are frequently inferior to the red-nosed clown, such notions are destined to be a hard sell to those who have E.M. Forster on their bedside table and a clump of dried narcissus up their ass.Not to worry. As long as words and ideas exist, there will be a few misfits who will cavort with them in a spirit of *approfondement*–if I may borrow that marvelous French word that translates roughly as ‘playing easily in the deep’–and in so doing they will occasionally bring to realization Kafka’s belief that ‘a novel should be an ax for the frozen seas around us’.

~ Tom Robbins

Tom Robbins Approfondement Fun Humor Lightness Play Playfulness

wash the brush, just beats the devil out of it

~ Bob Ross

Bob Ross Art Art History Fun Humor

If idiots could fly, the sky would be like an airport.

~ Laura Davenport

Laura Davenport Humor Idiots Sky

I look up in the sky, what do I see? Well blue.

~ Omer Abazi

Omer Abazi Blue Humor Sky

Feel free to look around, but being as though there aren't any people eighteen or older here, stay off the bed. I'm not allowed to get pregnant this weekend.

~ Colleen Hoover

Colleen Hoover Holder Humor Pregnant Sky

Get out of here. Yoda so does not have an English accent!''Other than that you're saying I'm a dead ringer?''If the shoe fits.''Sheesh, I hate tall girls.

~ Joss Stirling

Joss Stirling Humor Sky

Fine, I'll teach you,''Besides, there's only so many times a girl wants to fall on her butt in front of the boy she's out to impress.

~ Joss Stirling

Joss Stirling Humor Sky

Wisdom you speak, Obi Tina.''None of that - I'm the one who gets to speak backwards - no, we're both wrong - that's the little green guy, Yoda.''You're right. So I just get to pout and act badly when you try and teach me anything.''Try channelling Luke rather than Annakin - the outcome is better.

~ Joss Stirling

Joss Stirling Humor Sky

You have no idea how crazy I am, I should be wearing yellow Caution tape, I'm that bonkers.

~ Robin Benway

Robin Benway Crazy Humor

Crazy gets all the knives.

~ Seanan Mcguire

Seanan Mcguire Crazy Humor

He was obviously on the wrong side of crazy.

~ Heather Webber

Heather Webber Crazy Humor

Have you ever been at a point that you don't know what to say? But yet you came up with this crazy idea to type this.

~ Eric Mayes

Eric Mayes Crazy Humor Silly

I don't know what she's thinking, but I'm thinking how fluid the border is between crazy and interesting, and how hard it is to decide who belongs where.

~ Melissa Decarlo

Melissa Decarlo Crazy Crazy People Humor Interesting People

Why is it that the Alpha females are crazy?Meryn shrugged. She made sense to me.Colton turned to Meryn. You also set Aiden's car on fire when he ignored you.Amelia looked at Meryn. Sounds reasonable.Meryn grinned. I know, right?

~ Alanea Alder

Alanea Alder Crazy Humor

Writing is like talking to yourself, just in a way that makes it look like you're not crazy!

~ Mary Kate

Mary Kate Crazy Creative Humor Me Talking To Yourself Thoughtful Way Writing

If you can't beat em. Become as crazy as a fuckin' loon and enjoy the ride.

~ Mark Tufo

Mark Tufo Crazy Humor Zombie

He is as good as anybody in this parish! He is very particular, too, about going to church-yes, he is!''I am afeard nobody ever saw him there. I never did, certainly.''The reason of that is,' she said eagerly, 'that he goes in privately by the old tower door, just when the service commences, and sits at the back of the gallery. He told me so.'This supreme instance of Troy's goodness fell upon Gabriel's ears like the thirteenth stroke of a crazy clock. It was not only received with utter incredulity as regarded itself, but threw doubt on all the assurances that had preceded it.

~ Thomas Hardy

Thomas Hardy Crazy Delusional Far From The Madding Crowd Humor Lol Nonsense Thomas Hardy

This supreme instance of Troy's goodness fell upon Gabriel's ears like the thirteenth stroke of a crazy clock.

~ Thomas Hardy

Thomas Hardy Crazy Far From The Madding Crowd Favorite Gabriel Oak Humor Nonsense Ridiculous Sergeant Troy Simile

The difference between your crazy and my crazy is that you don't think you're crazy.

~ Steve Maraboli

Steve Maraboli Crazy Embrace Humor Life Wit

Greetings, cybernuts! This is I.B. Nosey, your official unofficial reporter!

~ I.b. Nosey

I.b. Nosey Bizarre Crazy Famous Celebrity Humor Interviews Journalism With A Definite Slant Miss Mae Original

If a 6 foot tall talking Badger comes to your door with a great deal on health insurance, be certain to ask if it includes in-patient psychiatric care.

~ David C. Holley

David C. Holley Badger Crazy Health Insurance Humor Jokes Psychiatric Sales

Quit analyzing me. My crazy needs no definition.

~ K.f. Breene

K.f. Breene Crazy Definition Humor

Day had gotten a little nervous during one session when the doctor asked God how he would handle someone hurting Day now and his lover responded by jerking one side of his leather coat open and pulling his long blade from its sheathe. “Easy, I’d cut their fucking arm off and beat the shit out of them with it,” he’d said. But Day quickly started laughing and told the concerned doctor that his partner was just playing. After popping God hard in his stomach, God agreed and said he was indeed joking. When the doctor went back to writing on her legal pad, God mouthed to him, “No I’m not.

~ A.e. Via

A.e. Via Crazy Funny Humor Nothing Special Protectiveness

There really is no sense in pretending to be normal. Just be you because the moment you do, weirder things happen. Crazy comes back into fashion and every woman has to go out and find her some.

~ Shannon L. Alder

Shannon L. Alder Copying Crazy Emulation Flattery Funny Humor Insane Prodigy Strange Weird Weirdness
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