Skulduggery Pleasant Quotes

You have no idea about presents or what they mean. The lastpresent you gave me was a stick.”“You wanted a weapon.”“It was a stick.”“It had a bow on it.”“It was a stick.”“I thought you liked the stick. You laughed.

~ Derek Landy

Corrival looked around. 'So is this it? Is everyone here? Erskine, maybe you should start the ball rolling. I have places to go and things to do.''Me?' Ravel asked. 'Why do I have to start it? You're the most respected mage here. You start it, or Skulduggery.'Skulduggery shook his head. 'I can't start it. I don't like most of these people. I might start shooting.

~ Derek Landy

He put on his hat and wrapped his scarf around his jaw, but did without the wig and the sunglasses. He clicked his key chain and the car beeped and the doors locked.That's it?He looked up. Sorry?Aren't you afraid it might get stolen? We're not exactly in a good part of town.It's got a car alarm.Don't you, like, cast a spell or something? To keep it safe?No. It's a pretty good car alarm.

~ Derek Landy

Peace means nothing without freedom.

~ Derek Landy

Kindness suits you.Really? I think I'm quite allergic to it.

~ Derek Landy

It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like.

~ Derek Landy

I love you all, even those I don’t particularly like. That’s you, Beryl.

~ Derek Landy

When I meet people, I no longer say Hi, I'm Derek Landy, pleased to meet you. Now I say Hi, I'm number one bestselling author Derek Landy. Worship me.

~ Derek Landy

Sometimes it's not what you say, Valkyrie, it's just the fact that you're saying it.

~ Derek Landy

I wasn't always who I am now. No one ever is. I've spent my entire lifetime becoming who I am. Finally, I'm here and I'm old. It's depressing, it really is.

~ Derek Landy

I understand perfectly. Darquesse isn't a separate entity. She isn't another person. She's you. If you make the wrong choices, if you stop loving the people who love you, if you allow the world to twist and turn and change you, then yes, the future we've seen will come to pass. But if you fight, and if you kick, and struggle, and refuse to give in to the apathy, or the anger, or the hopelessness, then you'll change the future, and you'll walk your own path. And I'll be right there beside you, Valkyrie. I'll always be beside you.

~ Derek Landy

Stephanie had no problem doing what shewas told, just so long as she was given a good reason why sheshould.

~ Derek Landy

Valkyrie Cain got out of the passenger side. She zipped upher black jacket against the cold, and joined Skulduggery as hewalked up to the front door. She glanced at him, and saw that he was smiling.Stop doing that,” she sighed.“Stop doing what?” Skulduggery responded in that gloriously velvet voice of his.“Stop smiling. The person we want to talk to lives in the only dark house on a bright street. That’s not a good sign.”“I didn’t realise I was smiling,” he said. They stopped at the door, and Skulduggery made a concerted effort to shift his features. His mouth twitcheddownwards. “Am I smiling now?”“No.”“Excellent,” he said, and the smile immediately sprang back up.

~ Derek Landy

Valkyrie smiled patiently. I like how you do your make-up. Do you use a brush, or just dip your head in the bucket?

~ Derek Landy

Well, OK then. He narrowed his eyes. How about you? Do you have any...romances I should know about?Nope. Not one.Well, good. Excellent. There'll be plenty of time for boys when you leave college and become a nun.She smiled. I'm glad you have such ambitious dreams for me.

~ Derek Landy

Right, well, we've got to work out what we need. We've got to work out what we need, how we get it, and what we need to get to get what we need.

~ Derek Landy

No one likes sarcasm, Miss Cain. I’ve merely delayed my exit to promise you something. You took my straight razor, li’l darlin’. That I view as an unforgivable offense. So when the time comes, when you have served your purpose, I swear to you I’m gonna kill you for free.” And with that, Billy-Ray Sanguine disappeared into the ground. Then he popped his head back up. “Or at least half price.” And he was gone again.

~ Derek Landy