There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
~ Douglas Adams
There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it.
~ Bertrand Russell
Where is human nature so weak as in the bookstore?
~ Henry Ward Beecher
I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
~ Mark Twain
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.
~ W.c. Fields
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
~ Mae West
It is hard enough to remember my opinions, without also remembering my reasons for them!
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
Happiness is a warm puppy.
~ Charles M. Schulz
So please, oh please, we beg, we pray,Go throw your TV set away,And in its place you can installA lovely bookshelf on the wall.Then fill the shelves with lots of books.
~ Roald Dahl
Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope.
~ Dr. Seuss
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.
I have great faith in fools - self-confidence my friends will call it.
~ Edgar Allan Poe
Percy wouldn't notice a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing one of Dobby's hats.
~ J.k. Rowling
Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
~ Anthony G. Oettinger
I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.
~ Oscar Wilde
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
~ Winston S. Churchill
I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
~ George Burns
Deadlines just aren't real to me until I'm staring one in the face.
~ Rick Riordan
The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.
Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.
~ Terry Pratchett
Don't talk to me.Why not?Because I want to fix that in my memory for ever. Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret...
I’d said it before and meant it: Alive or undead, the love of my life was a badass.
~ Richelle Mead
Mom says it's because she has PMS.Do you even know what that means?I'm not a little kid anymore. It means pissed-at- men syndrome
~ Nicholas Sparks
Only a true best friend can protect you from your immortal enemies.
There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor.
~ Charles Dickens
I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.
~ Lemony Snicket
Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try!
Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.
~ James Patterson
If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.
Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
~ Steven Wright
Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you.
~ Cassandra Clare
Just because you call an electric eel a rubber duck doesn't make it a rubber duck, does it? And God help the poor bastard who decides they want to take a bath with the duckie. (Jace Wayland)
Holey? You have the the whole world of ear-related humor before you, you go for holey?
Now, you two – this year, you behave yourselves. If I get one more owl telling me you've – you've blown up a toilet or –Blown up a toilet? We've never blown up a toilet.Great idea though, thanks, Mum.
What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.
Don't Panic.
Do your thing and don't care if they like it.
~ Tina Fey
Oh well... I'd just been thinking, if you had died, you'd have been welcome to share my toilet.
History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
