Famous Quotes

Professors of literature collect books the way a ship collects barnacles, without seeming effort.

~ Carolyn G. Heilbrun

For the record, I would like to point out that it is NOT being obsessive to memorize a boy's schedule so that you can accidentally bump into him. It is called being efficient.

~ Jess Rothenberg

Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There is too much fraternizing with the enemy.

~ Henry Kissinger

You could shove it up your ass and pretend you're a corn dog.COURTESY VIOLATION-RESPONSE MUTED-VIOLATION LOGGED

~ Ernest Cline

I hate women who complain about being fat when they're like a size 5. Anything under size 5 isn't a woman. It's a boy with breasts.

~ Laurell K. Hamilton

Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing but nobody else does.

~ Steuart Henderson Britt

Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It's unbridled, its unplanned, it's full of suprises.

~ Erma Bombeck

I had a polynomial once. My doctor removed it.

~ Michael Grant

Marry me, he says. I got all my own teeth, I wash twice a year an I'll cut you in fer half the business here.

~ Moira Young

How are you feeling?I leaned away from him. Gross.Aiden frowned. Gross?I haven't brushed my teeth or washed my face in days. Don't come near me.He laughed. Alex, come on.Seriously, I'm gross. I put my hand over my mouth.Ignoring my protests, he leaned over and brushed my string hair back. You're as beautiful as always, Alex.I stared at him. He must not get out much.

~ Jennifer L. Armentrout

Do you find this...distracting?

~ Suzanne Collins

'Tell Suzie she's a lucky cat.' Have sexier words ever been spoken?

~ Ally Carter

If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?

~ George Deacon

But Grover’s voice was already growing fainter. ‘Sweet dreams. Don’t let me die!

~ Rick Riordan

Every time I annoy him he retreats into his No Mundanes Allowed tree house. Simon pointed at Jace.

~ Cassandra Clare

You can run from the grave, but you can't hide.

~ Jeaniene Frost

Ransom really looked at the other man for the first time, shook his head, stared again.“Holy hell, your eyes are like a fucking viper’s.” Venom raised an eyebrow.“You have hair prettier than one of Astaad’s concubines.” Ransom gave the vampire the finger. Venom grinned.

~ Nalini Singh

I don't know where people got the idea that characters in books are supposed to be likable. Books are not in the business of creating merely likeable characters with whom you can have some simple identification with. Books are in the business of creating great stories that make you're brain go ahhbdgbdmerhbergurhbudgerbudbaaarr.

~ John Green

My relationship with my father had been on the proverbial fritz since the time I was fifteen and called the police to report him for child molesting. He had never molested me, but I wanted to have a party that weekend and needed him out of the house.

~ Chelsea Handler

CUSTOMER: Do you have this children's book I've heard about? It's supposed to be very good. It's called Lionel Richie and the Wardrobe.

~ Jen Campbell

Above all, if what you've done is stupid, but it works, it ain't stupid.

~ Robert Fulghum

You can read minds, and you didn't tell me?” Link stared at me like he just found out I was the Silver Surfer. He rubbed his head nervously. “Hey, man, all that stuff about Lena? I was yankin’ your chain.” He looked away. “Are you doin’ it now? You're doin’ it, aren't you? Dude, get out of my head.” He backed away from me and into the bookshelf.“I can't read your mind, you idiot.

~ Kami Garcia

If Marilyn Monroe was alive right now, what would she be doing?'Clawing at the roof of her coffin.

~ Chuck Palahniuk

He specialized in the murder of dreams, Hazel Grace...

~ John Green

Housework won't kill you, but then again, why take the chance?

~ Phyllis Diller

Once again, I've been thwarted by the massive difference between my vision of the successful me and the me I'm currently stuck with.

~ Lauren Graham

Revenge is sweet and not fattening.

~ Alfred Hitchcock

To say I had some pent-up anger would be like saying Britney Spears had minor impulse-control issues.

~ Molly Harper

I don't mind foreigners. God save the queen! he squeaked and ran.

~ Jeaniene Frost

There's a meeting in Command. Disregard your current schedule,' he says. 'Done,' I say.'Did you follow it at all today?' he asks in exasperation.'Who knows? I'm mentally disoriented.' I hold up my wrist to show my medical bracelet and realize it's gone. 'See? I can't even remember they took my bracelet.' (Katniss and Boggs)

~ Suzanne Collins

Actually I don't remember being born, it must have happened during one of my black outs.

~ Jim Morrison

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

~ Dorothy Parker

That's it, cupcake. You're going down.

~ Rick Riordan

Somewhere, the zebra is dancing.

~ Garth Stein

Bad kitty! he screeched, snarling and baring his fangs at Grimalkin, who yawned and turned away to groom his tail. Evil, evil, sneaky kitty! Bite your head off in your sleep, I will! Hang you by your toes and set you on fire! Burn, Burn!-Razor

~ Julie Kagawa

Put some clothes on, you weird, yellow-eyed, table-dancing, werewolf-training, cryptic, stare-me-right-in-the-eyes-and-don't-even-blink wench.

~ Jim Butcher

I hate the vamp jobs. They think they're so suave. It's not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want to be all sexy, too. And trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy.

~ Kiersten White

Unusual financial activity: none, unless you count the fact that someone in the family is way too into Civil War biographies. (Can this be a possible indication of Confederate insurgents still living and working in Virginia? Must research further.)

~ Ally Carter

You know, I can see more than just the future or the past.Really? I asked, paging through through the papers in the file. Can you also see the present? Because I can do that, too. Like, right now, I sense that I'm in a messy room with a total toolbox.

~ Rachel Hawkins

Heartache often drives us to consume things we wouldn't otherwise, such as an entire pint of Caramel Pecan Perfection high-fat ice cream, covered in ganache, the crack cocaine of frozed dairy. Twelve hundred calories per pint, six hundred and eighty of which are fat calories, but is only dulls the pain for the moment, there's that carb fog while you're standing at the sink shoving it in your face, and then it's over and you feel...used. Like a cheap pickup the Dove people seduced and abandoned in your kitchen, leaving you with sticky hands and an empty cup and a still-broken heart, except now you're mad at Dove, too.

~ Jennifer Crusie