Famous Quotes

You told me I was the best sex you'd ever had in your life...You couldn't get enough...At one point you were so loud I thought sure hotel security was going to beat down the door.

~ Rachel Gibson

I like pancakes.

~ Brandon Mull

I'm amazing and studly, but I have limits.

~ Jim Butcher

All I really wanted to do was cuddle back under the blankets, maybe with a certain stuffed toy penguin I knew. Yeah, hiding sounded good.

~ Laurell K. Hamilton

Women are sneaky.

~ Patricia Briggs

If we would learn what the human race really is at bottom, we need only observe it in election times.

~ Mark Twain

I alternate between feeling sympathetic toward humanity and being a misanthrope. When I'm sympathetic, it usually means I haven't been around people in awhile.

~ John Raptor

I am perfectly qualified to give you an injection. You're not going to tell me you're afraid of a little prick?I wouldn't call you that...

~ Anthony Horowitz

This was very exciting. I'd never had two boys get into a fight over me before. The fact that one of the boys was my stepbrother, however, and held about as much romantic appeal for me as Max, the family dog, somewhat dampened my enthusiasm. And Michael wasn't much of a catch, either, when you actually thought about it, being a potential murderer and all. Oh, why did I have to have such a couple of losers fighting over me? Why couldn't Matt Damon and Ben Affleck fight over me? Now that would be truly excellent.

~ Meg Cabot

As for Gussie Finknottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.

~ P.g. Wodehouse

We made too many wrong mistakes.

~ Yogi Berra

I don't mind if you forget me.Having learned my lesson,I never left an impression on anyone.

~ Morrissey

Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.

~ Louise Rennison

But that was life: Nobody got a guided tour to their own theme park. You had to hop on the rides as they presented themselves, never knowing whether you would like the one you were in line for...or if the bastard was going to make you throw up your corn dog and your cotton candy all over the place.

~ J.r. Ward

You don't happen to have a thousand dollars I can borrow? I don't have five you can borrow. My piggy bank is officialy anorexic.

~ Becca Fitzpatrick

Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.

~ Criss Jami

Dear Non-American Black, when you make the choice to come to America, you become black. Stop arguing. Stop saying I'm Jamaican or I'm Ghanaian. America doesn't care.

~ Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

Most of the upper management of I.S. were undead. I always thought it was because the job was easier if you didn't have a soul.

~ Kim Harrison

Tut, Tut, looks like rain

~ A.a. Milne

Hell's bells, irony blows.

~ Jim Butcher

If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. And probably increase.

~ George Carlin

I've tried to get the angel to watch MTV so I can learn the vocabulary of your music, but even with the gift of tongues, I'm having trouble learning to speak hip-hop. Why is it that one can busta rhyme or busta move anywhere but you must busta cap in someone's ass? Is ho always feminine, and muthafucka always masculine, while bitch can be either? How many peeps in a posse, how much booty before baby got back, do you have to be all that to get all up in that, and do I need to be dope and phat to be da bomb or can I just be stupid? I'll not be singing over any dead mothers until I understand.

~ Christopher Moore

Do you sleep naked?

~ Becca Fitzpatrick

I'd rather be fried alive and eaten by Mexicans.

~ Roald Dahl

How can such scary looking parents create something so cute?

~ Chetan Bhagat

I love the Olympics, because they enable people from all over the world to come together and--regardless of their political or cultural differences--accuse each other of cheating.

~ Dave Barry

I'm not stubborn. My way is just better.

~ Maya Banks

I'm so pretty, it's hard for me to think of myself as intelligent.

~ Jim Butcher

What a strange family you are! Is your name Lettie too?

~ Diana Wynne Jones

What's the use of a great city having temptations if fellows don't yield to them?

~ P.g. Wodehouse

Why couldn't you turn into a fireball when we were on the same team!

~ Pittacus Lore

Sir Beldevere: What makes you think she's a witch? Peasant 3: Well, she turned me into a newt! Sir Beldevere: A newt? Peasant 3: [meekly after a long pause] ... I got better. Crowd: [shouts] Burn her anyway!

~ Graham Chapman

I sheathed my blade and glared at him. And here I almost thought you weren't a complete bastard.Well, that's your mistake, not mine.

~ Julie Kagawa

Ambulances were cool. “You just want to fondle my extraneous body parts,” I said to the EMT as I picked up a silver gadget that looked disturbingly like an alien orifice probe, broke it, then promptly put it back, hoping it wouldn’t leave someone’s life hanging in the balance because the EMT couldn’t alien-probe his orifices.

~ Darynda Jones

Michael had to pound me a couple of times to convince me not to go stage a rescue. Shane shrugged. He hits like a girl, for a vampire.

~ Rachel Caine

BE QUIET!!...What do you want...? I was in the middle of saying something nice...

~ Tite Kubo

Personally, I like it much better when someone else does the decision making. That way you have legitimate grounds to whine and complain. I tend to find both whining and complaining quite interesting and amusing, though sometimes--unfortunately--it's hard to choose which one of the two I want to do.Sigh. LIfe can be so tough sometimes.

~ Brandon Sanderson

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?

~ Woody Allen

Maybe we should go on lots of double dates,” Cath said, “and then we can get married on the same day in a double ceremony, in matching dresses, and the four of us will light the unity candle all at the same time.”“Pfft,” Levi said, “I’m picking out my own dress.

~ Rainbow Rowell

It was beautiful in a harsh I'm-going-to-gut-you-like-a-fish kind of way.

~ Rick Riordan