Famous Quotes

Wait. Why am I thinking about Krispy Kremes? We’re supposed to be exercising.

~ Meg Cabot

Think, think, think.

~ A.a. Milne

You're only a man! You've not our gifts! I can tell you! Why, a woman can think of a hundred different things at once, all them contradictory!

~ Georgette Heyer

In life you'll meet a lot of jerks. If they hurt you, tell yourself that it's because they're stupid. That will help keep you from reacting to their cruelty. Because there is nothing worse than bitterness and vengeance... Always keep your dignity and be true to yourself.

~ Marjane Satrapi

Then you remember the dream,” Mencheres stated. “That bodes ill.” The fear of that made my reply snappy. “Hey, Walks Like An Egyptian, how about for once you drop the formal stuff and talk like you live in the twenty-first century?” The shit’s gonna splatter, start buggin’, yo,” Mencheres responded instantly. I stared at him, then burst out laughing, which was highly inappropriate considering the very grave warning he’d just conveyed.

~ Jeaniene Frost

Once I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: No good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

They're book addicts.

~ Lemony Snicket

I never made a mistake in my life; at least, never one that I couldn't explain away afterwards.

~ Rudyard Kipling

Do you think it's possible for an entire nation to be insane?

~ Terry Pratchett

Everybody going to be dead one day, just give them time.

~ Neil Gaiman

Being a detective isn't all about torture and murder and monsters. Sometimes it gets truly unpleasant...The fate of the world may depend on whether or not you can bring yourself to visit your relatives.

~ Derek Landy

Yes, the long war on Christianity. I pray that one day we may live in an America where Christians can worship freely! In broad daylight! Openly wearing the symbols of their religion... perhaps around their necks? And maybe -- dare I dream it? -- maybe one day there can be an openly Christian President. Or, perhaps, 43 of them. Consecutively.

~ Jon Stewart

If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.

~ Stephen Colbert

Aziraphale collected books. If he were totally honest with himself he would have to have admitted that his bookshop was simply somewhere to store them. He was not unusual in this. In order to maintain his cover as a typical second-hand book seller, he used every means short of actual physical violence to prevent customers from making a purchase. Unpleasant damp smells, glowering looks, erratic opening hours - he was incredibly good at it.

~ Terry Pratchett

I didn't know that idiocy caused people to just start spontaneously bleeding from the nose.

~ Veronica Roth

If something is going to happen to me, I want to be there.

~ Albert Camus

You can only be in a bad mood for so long before you have to face up to the fact that it isn't a bad mood at all, it's just your sucky personality.

~ Megan Mccafferty

Boys. I'd turn gay if they weren't so sexy.

~ Rachel Caine

Fine! I'll throw on some clothes. Turn around. I'm in my pj'sI'm a guy. That's like asking a kid not to glance at the candy counter.

~ Becca Fitzpatrick

There are never enough 'I love you's.

~ Lenny Bruce

Brevity is the soul of lingerie.

~ Dorothy Parker

I look up to say something but he puts his finger to my lips and whispers, “Don’t talk. You’ll just spoil my fantasy of rescuing an innocent damsel in distress as soon as you open your mouth.

~ Susan Ee

A good night sleep, or a ten minute bawl, or a pint of chocolate ice cream, or all three together, is good medicine.

~ Ray Bradbury

If we're going to the Silent City, you might want to get dressed. I mean, I appreciate the bra-and-panties look, but I don't know if the Silent Brothers will. There are only a few of the left, and I don't want them to die of excitement.

~ Cassandra Clare

If you aren't cute, you may as well be clever.

~ David Sedaris

Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days.

~ Flannery O'connor

I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep my expectations.

~ Bill Watterson

I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons. - Greg Heffley

~ Jeff Kinney

It is a good rule in life never to apologize. The right sort of people do not want apologies, and the wrong sort take a mean advantage of them.

~ P.g. Wodehouse

I'm going to talk to her.And how's that going to go? You're just going to walk up to her and say, 'Hey, I know you've never seen me before, but I'm your dad. Oh, and guess what? You've won the evolutionary lottery: You're a vampire. Let's go to Disneyland!

~ J.r. Ward

If you had a million years to do it in, you couldn't rub out even half the Fuck you signs in the world. It's impossible.

~ J.d. Salinger

So I hear we get to go to town this weekend. Want to catch a movie or something?--ZP.S. That is, if Jimmy doesn't mind.Translation: This weekend might be a good chance for us to see each other outside our school in a social environment, free of competetiton. I do not view other boys as threats, and I enjoy making them seem insignificant by calling them the wrong names. (Translation by Macey McHenry)

~ Ally Carter

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.

~ Jon Stewart

I wasn't fooled. He was avoiding looking at me. There's nothing to talk about.I knew you'd say that. Actually, it was a toss-up between that and 'I don't know what you're talking about.'Dimitri sighed.

~ Richelle Mead

Run first,' Shane said. 'Mourn later.'It was the perfect motto for Morganville.

~ Rachel Caine

Is there any point asking what you're going to make me do on Sunday?''Not really.'Okay. 'Is there any point asking what you're going to do to me?'He grinned wickedly. 'Not really.'Fabulous. 'Does it involve the use of a safe word?''That will depend entirely on you.' Noah moved impossibly closer, just inches away. A few freckles disappeared into the scruff on his jaw. 'I'll be gentle,' Noah added. My breath caught in my throat as he looked at me from beneath those lashes, ruining me.I narrowed my eyes at him. 'You're evil.'In response, Noah smiled, and raised his finger to gently tap the tip of my nose. 'And you're mine,' he said, then walked away.

~ Michelle Hodkin

What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.

~ Douglas Adams

Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel better about a terrible situation.

~ Lemony Snicket

He f**ks even better than he looks”, I settled on saying. Several heads turned. I didn’t care; I was pissed. “And that beautiful face is going to be clamped between my legs as soon as we get home, don’t you worry.

~ Jeaniene Frost

Although I was able to maintain a pleasant expression, I was mentally throwing up in her face.

~ Augusten Burroughs