Joke Quotes

Conversation of the Day -He: How do you describe yourself in two words?Me: You don't.

~ Sanhita Baruah

An old joke has an Oxford professor meeting an American former graduate student and asking him what he's working on these days. 'My thesis is on the survival of the class system in the United States.' 'Oh really, that's interesting: one didn't think there was a class system in the United States.' 'Nobody does. That's how it survives.

~ Christopher Hitchens

If u want to work in Corporate, then u should know how to play Chess.

~ Honeya

The average adult hates being treated like a child, unless it suits them.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We would not be ashamed of doing some of the things we do in private, if the number of sane human beings who do them in public were large enough.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We seldom look up to the person, we usually look up to their persona.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Unrequited love is a billion times less intolerable than unrequited hate.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

There would definitely be way fewer instances of cheating, if the average couple did not have sex only when the woman feels like it.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some men would not still be HIV negative or alive, if they had managed to sleep with some of the women with whom they want or wanted to have sex.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Death would not surprise us as often as it does, if we let go of the misbelief that newborns are less mortal than the elderly.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

He with the cleanest clothes isn’t necessarily the cleanest.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Because he has finally realized that it is it and not him that is loved by the woman he loves, many a man is jealous of his own car, house, wardrobe, or salary.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Attending a funeral would leave the average person insane, if they truly believed that sooner or later they are also going to die.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We are sometimes depressed by our failure to convince people who strongly believe that we are that we are definitely not depressed.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Every single person is a fool, insane, a failure, or a bad person to at least ten people.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We are sometimes dragged into a pit of unhappiness by someone else’s opinion that we do not look happy.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Nothing is as irritating to a shy man as a confident girl.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Even the world’s greatest actor cannot fake an erection.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Whenever they are condemning weaves or breast implants, some people speak so passionately that their false teeth almost fall out.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Marketing is so powerful that it can make even an extremely untalented musician a one-hundred-hits wonder.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some women have kissed—and some are kissing—a lot of frogs, even though the very first man that they have each kissed was and is still a prince.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

The least we each ought to do for someone who treats us like a king or a queen is to treat them like a prince or a princess.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most women sell sex, most of them just don’t take cash (nor do they each sell to more than one ‘client’ at a time).

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most unintelligent or foolish people do not regard themselves as that, they regard themselves as not-that-intelligent or not-that-wise.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Saying that you do not remember something or someone is a less embarrassing or hurtful way of saying that you do not know it or them anymore.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people wouldn’t still be sane, if they were not religious or superstitious; some wouldn’t be disabled or dead.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Many a man was caused to perish by something that he and many men cherish.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Whenever He answers prayers, God usually prioritizes those by people who, instead of their mouths, have prayed with their hands and/or feet.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most priests wish they were as righteous as they seem to most members of their congregations.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

When you are suffering from sexual starvation, a spank or even a hug seems like a porn scene.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

There probably was a time when the idea of having a toilet inside a house was repulsive.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Not everyone who condemns masturbation can masturbate.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

There would be fewer absent fathers, if straight men were turned on only by women with whom they would not mind having children.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Unbeknown to us, some of the people who we hope are missing us wherever they are do miss us; some miss someone else; and some are dead.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

A tie is what you get after ice cubes have wrestled with hot water.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people do not really hate aging, they merely love the colour black.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

An arrogant man whose arrogance we see from his own behaviour is more tolerable than a humble man whose humility we hear of from his own mouth.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people ate less food less often when they each had a home than they now do as hobos.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people would not be dead if they have not gotten the things or people they had prayed for.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people would not have remained with their partners, if the unfortunate things that have happened to them had happened to their partners, or if the fortunate things that have happened to their partners had happened to them.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Joke quote from classy quote