Satirical Quotes

If we were not impressed by job titles, suits, and jargon, we would demand that financial advisors show us their personal bank statements before they tell us what we could or should do with our own money.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Mokokoma Mokhonoana Adage Adages Advice Advices Advisor Advisors Africa African Aphorism Aphorisms Axiom Axioms Bank Bank Statement Bank Statements Banks Bombast Bombastic Clothes Clothes Make The Man Clothes Maketh The Man Clothing Deep Dictum Dictums Epigram Epigrams Financial Advice Financial Advices Financial Advisor Financial Advisors Financial Freedom Funny Gnome Gnomes Humor Humorous Humour Impress Impressed Impression Income Insightful Invest Investment Investments Jargon Job Job Title Job Titles Jobs Language Made Me Think Make You Think Maxim Maxims Money Passive Passive Income Philosopher Policies Policy Profound Proverb Proverbs Provoke Thought Quotation Quotations Quote Quote Of The Day Quotes Rich Riches Salaries Salary Satire Satirical Satirist Satirists Saying Sayings Share Shareholder Shareholders Shareholding Shares South Africa South African Suit Suits Tailor Tailor Made Tailored Suit Tailored Suits Tailors Thought Provoking Thoughtful Tuxedo Wage Wages Wealth Wealthy

Boredom is probably more frequent and more tormenting if you do not have sight or hands.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

In some cases, you can tell how somebody is being treated by their own boss from the way they are treating someone to whom they are a boss.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people are each holding on to a lover of theirs who no longer loves them and/or who they no longer love, only because they do not want to have a reason or another reason to be jealous of the person who would eventually be their lover if they let go of them.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most men would no longer enjoy conversing with most women if they stopped bringing their vaginas along.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

A relationship is likely to last way longer, if each partner convinces or has convinced themselves that they do not deserve their partner, even if that is not true.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

More often than not, an inspirational or motivational speaker is someone who makes money from telling us that we can do all of the things that we can do … and pretty much all of the things that we cannot do.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Adults who use big words in order to seem intelligent are annoying, especially those who are not intelligent.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most of us cling to life as if our existence were a result of our deed or choice.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Bigheadedness is usually a symptom of small-mindedness.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Not everyone who talks less or keeps quiet whenever they are with or around you does that because they find you interesting or knowledgeable, some people do that because they find you boring or ignorant.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people would have killed themselves and/or someone else if they were single, and some people would not have done that.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people will hate you for not loving them.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We are way less likely to love someone just because they love us than we are to hate someone just because they hate us.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

The fact that the person who you are sleeping with is also sleeping with another person or other people does not necessarily mean that he or she does not love you. And the fact that you are the only person who someone is sleeping with does not necessarily mean that he or she loves you.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

A seemingly simple task like taking a bath or wearing a condom feels like multitasking to someone who suffers from hemiplegia or has only one hand.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most human beings strongly believe that money is way less important than the life of a human being, but in reality five hundred, fifty, or even five dollars are way more important to the lives of most human beings than the lives of most human beings.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most human beings would have never been pained by the death of a human being if they had never seen a human being or pretending to be pained by that.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

More often than not, expecting to lose weight without first losing the diet that made the weight loss necessary is like expecting a pig to be spotless after hosing it down while it was still rolling in mud.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Plants are more courageous than almost all human beings: an orange tree would rather die than produce lemons, whereas instead of dying the average person would rather be someone they are not.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Being bored is the price we pay for not being insane.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We are loved way more by some of the people who have not contacted us in the last twelve or so months than we are loved by some of those who contact us every twelve or so days … or hours.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

We all have problems. Or rather, everyone has at least one thing that they regard as a problem.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Many a death was precipitated by the food, the job, or the medication whose main function was to postpone it.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

When in court, the primary role of lawyers is not to prove or disprove innocence; unbeknown to almost all lawyers and their clients, it is to save the court time.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

The death of a billionaire is worth more to the media than the lives of a billion poor people.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

One of the main functions of a push-up bra is to lower the number of mothers who seem like mothers.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

The kind of lies that someone tells us gives us an idea of how stupid, knowledgeable, intelligent, or ignorant they are … or they think we are.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

An expensive coffin does not decrease the deceased’s chances of going to hell.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Unless they are off duty, no matter how wide it is, and even when it is sincere, a smile seems fake if the job description of the person who is smiling includes smiling.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people have contracted HIV during their separate endeavours to give someone or some people a curable STD.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

You cannot be truly humble, unless you truly believe that life can and will go on without you.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Famine sometimes increases the number of people who are overweight.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some social ills are preserved by the common misbelief that things such as ignorance, greed, and stupidity do not have the stamina required to reach old age.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

A truly compassionate man gives a poor woman a portion of his meal before he eats, not after he has eaten.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some women’s greatest achievement is sleeping with a man who is rich, famous, and/or wanted by many women, whereas some women’s greatest achievement is refusing to sleep with such a man.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Most people do kiss and tell, most of them just don’t tell many people.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Some people masturbate to temporarily replace their partners when they are absent, whereas some people do that to temporarily live in the present.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

With regard to things such as independence, mental capabilities, and sexuality, a very old man is nothing but a gigantic infant with white hair and wrinkles.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Life sometimes reminds us that it is sometimes heartless by giving something or someone we really need to someone who does not need or even want them or it.

~ Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Satirical quote from classy quote